Surviving Barstool | Ep. 4 Premieres Monday (12/4) at 8PM ETWATCH EP. 1-3 NOW

High-Speed Chase Ends When The Guy Runs Himself Over With His Own Car

You hate to see that. Well not really because it wasn’t any of us getting run over by our own car so it’s all good but it sucks to be that guy. The cop at the very end being like, “He got run over by his own car” was laugh out loud funny. The people on the other end of that call had to be howling. It’s not every day that a high-speed chase ends with the person getting crushed by their own vehicle. A nice little change of pace from the driver smashing into a pole or another car.

A little known fact about me is I wanna be in a high-speed chase so badly. It’s a miracle I haven’t took the leap and done it. That’s how badly I wanna do it. If the consequences weren’t jail time, and the chances of me hurting someone else during a high-speed chase weren’t so high, I’d get in a high-speed chase today. I’d walk outside, spot the nearest car, steal it and we’d be off to the races. They look like so much fun. And yeah, there are video games like Need For Speed and Grand Theft Auto that simulate what it’s like to be in a high-speed chase but it’s just not the same. My goal is to live to be 90 years old and then get in a high-speed chase. The system would be gentle on a 90-year-old man who just wanted to go fast. Only 61 more years until I can make my lifelong dream come true.