Find Yourself Your Jenna And Never Let Her Go

Ladies, as you’re getting ready to go out, be sure that in addition to packing your clutch with extra bandaids because you know your heels are going to fuck your feet up, you take yourself a friend like Jenna.

Jenna will be there for you when you inevitably get too drunk and need to vom. Not only will she pull your hair back, she’ll even stick her finger down your throat if you REALLY need to throw up because you’re teeter-tottering the alcohol poisoning line.

Jenna is the type of girl that will talk to ugly, but-thinks-he’s-really-a-catch-because-he-wears-boat-shoes guy while you talk to Mr. Perfect.

Jenna won’t judge your horrible dancing. Or tell you “maybe you should slow down.” She would never dream of wearing a tighter dress than you and stealing your thunder.

Jenna is there for you.

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It doesn’t matter if wearing someone else’s engagement ring is bad luck. If she never gets married because of this photo shoot, Jenna will never blame you. Instead she’ll be the best aunt your kids ever had.

Call Jenna, make sure she has her nails did, and have yourself a Saturday night.