Grading the Newest Sex Scandal Teacher
Missouri - A Missouri volunteer track coach has been arrested for having sex with a 17-year-old student on her team after the two were caught mid-rendezvous by the boy’s father.
Ericka Beverly Oxford, 41. … worked with the Fort Zumwalt East High School’s boys track team two to three times a week from April through August, according to court documents.
The two would meet up for sex, at times the student sneaking out of his house to visit Oxford’s home, the teen said to St. Peters police.
However their relationship was outed in May 2018 when the student left track practice with Oxford and they went to his home, where his father caught them having intercourse. …
Fort Zumwalt East High’s principal sent a letter to parents to announce that the relationship did not take place on school grounds.
OK, is Ericka Beverly Oxford technically a teacher? No. A volunteer, three-days-a-week track coach is not a teacher in the technical sense. Is Ericka Beverly Oxford a deranged, nob-hungry lunatic for banging one of her high school trackletes. Also no. That makes her a deranged, nob-hungry lunatic in the literal sense.
But what actual teacher could blame her? The life of a volunteer, three-days-a-week anything is a thankless one. The hours are long. The commitment is huge. And the glory, if any, goes to someone else. And as the great Dan Jenkins put it, the only thing more boring than track is field. Meanwhile, the track coaches are out there after school, in all kinds of weather, working away in obscurity while their teacher colleagues are boning kids in the classroom, at home and public places. It’s a wonder more of these volunteers are taking matters into their own hands. Which I also mean literally.
The Grades:
Looks: Inside baseball: Today is one of the rare times I’m working from Barstool HQ in New York. So I decided to let someone else handle this grade. Which I never do. This anonymous co-worker respects the pressure of grading looks. All the factors that go into it. The quality of the photo. The lack of a body shot. The fact mugshots are nobody’s best moment. How she would clean up. Grading her against the curve of your own high school teachers and other 41-year-olds you know. Which is why I get more abuse for this part of this feature than practically anything else I do in life. All that taken into account, this Stool employee wanted to give her a B+. Which I vetoed. But I admire his spirit so I’ll only adjust her down to a
Grade: B-
Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: I almost didn’t even blog this one because it didn’t move the needle for me much. That is, until that little detail about the dad walking in on them in mid-penetration. Every parent’s greatest fear is the idea of walking in on their kid in mid-jerk, never mind that. So what does a father do with catching his 17-year-old nuts deep in his 41-year-old track coach? The answer must lie somewhere between “Whoops! Sorry! Don’t let me interrupt!” and chasing her out of the house while calling 911. There’s no template for that in all the child-rearing books.
Grade: B
Intangibles: How does the principal know they didn’t do it on campus? They do run track, afterall.
Grade: B-
Overall: B-. I do still think that Looks grade is a little strong, but I’ll let it stand.
Do you have someone you want to see graded? Tweet her to me @jerrythornton1 or email me at jerry@barstoolsports.com. Your service to the betterment of mankind will be its own reward.