Fun Police: Google is Going To Stop Suggesting "My Face" When People Type "Sit On"
Google has promised to fix a bug that auto-completes “sit on” to “sit on my face.” The raunchy message – which describes the sexual practice of “face-sitting” – was a failing of Google’s predictive text algorithms. Google uses messages you’ve previously sent to work out what you might want to say next – and will suggest words and phrases for you to use. But it can also suggest words or phrases that you’ve never previously uttered, which can sometimes cause problems.
In a statement, a Google spokesperson said: “Gboard is designed to avoid such predictions in its generic models.”
“But human language is complex and as with any sort of system that filters sensitive phrases, sometimes inappropriate suggestions make it through the machine learning models. When we learn of an inappropriate suggestion we work quickly to remove it.” Google actively blacklists some words or phrases from Gboard, to stop this kind of thing from happening. There are more than 1,400 words banned from Gboard’s prediction systems, including “intercourse,” “screwing,” “lovemaking,” “lactation,” “preggers” and “braless,” according to Wired.
Google AI trying to get some? A little horny are we? I personally don’t use the auto-suggester nor do I have autocorrect on, but I love seeing text message fuck-ups like this baby sitter. I mean that’s how some father-baby sitter pornos start right?
Dad “Hey are you free to sit on my face.”
Babysitter “Excuse me?”
Dad “I’m so sorry terrible autocorrect. Can you babySIT the kids tonight?”
Babysitter “Are you sure you didn’t mean that?”
Annddddd scene!
I live for that. Now it’s kind of outrageous that the suggestion for “sit on” is “my face” for Android phones in the first place, but I respect it. Some programmer was probably feeling a little aggressive on the job and slid that one in there thinking no one would notice. I love it. When I type “sit on my” into my iPhone I get three options: “bed, side, and way.” Clearly Apple thinks I’m a pussy, which isn’t far off I guess.
The words that Google have “blacklisted” from their Gboard are a little ridiculous. Screwing, lovemaking, and butt are a little much to be scrubbing from potential sentences if you ask me. Is it crazy that I don’t have autocorrect or even bother with the auto-suggester? The first day I got my iPhone I turned that off. I don’t need Apple or Android predicting my sentences and getting me in trouble. When I want to say something, I’m typing it out under my own free will.
I leave you with “Sit On My Face” from Monty Python live.