Not To Slut Shame But April The Giraffe Is Pregnant Again

You might remember April the giraffe from her viral pregnancy last year. She was strutting her ass and being a real camera whore for weeks while waiting for her giraffe baby to spill out on the floor of a barn like some common farm animal. It was gross. Majesty of life? Sure. If you’re a fucking sicko with no class, no morals, no damn home training.

Now, wouldnt you know it, April is pregnant again.

Wow. That’s funny. I dont remember seeing April’s wedding. I dont remember April even getting a serious boyfriend. Look, I understand we live in a more loose society than we have over the past couple of decades but my goodness. Where is the giraffe father? Whomst else is he sticking his giraffe dick in? April, honey… no one is gonna buy the giraffe cow if you’re giving your giraffe milk away for free.

While the media portrays this pregnancy as some kind of miracle, I will remind you that April and her vagabond ways are an attack on the institution of the family.

If you wanna crown her ass then crown her. I just find it appalling but that’s none of my business but she also kinda made it my business when she started live streaming her placenta stats all over youtube. Get your placenta off my feed, April. That’s all I’m asking.