Seventy-Two-Year-Old Arrested After Chasing His Neighbor Around With A Tractor Yelling "Run Fat Ass, Run"

Source -  A 72-year-old Florida man was arrested last month after he was caught on video chasing down his neighbor on a tractor during a dispute over property, police said.

Authorities had received a disturbance call around 8 p.m. When officers arrived on scene, Scott Lynch, 53, told them he with arguing with Morris, his neighbor, over property when the 72-year-old climbed onto his tractor and chased after him yelling, “Run, fat a**.” The video, filmed by Lynch’s wife, led to Morris’ arrest, according to News4JAX.

The 52-year-old was able to finally escape when he entered his garage and shut the door. Howell Lamar Morris of St. Augustine was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon without intent to kill. 

If he were ten years older this would’ve been all fun and games. Once you hit eighty you can say and do just about anything you want. In his defense it was a funny video, although I don’t think he was going for laughs. He was going for murder which can be problematic. My gut tells me this isn’t Scott’s first run in with the law either. Not with a face like this:

He looks like a Bichon Frisé that forgot to take its eye drops. That or the old man Marley from Home Alone. I wonder what they were arguing about; “property” is such a vague term. Judging from the outfits and Morris’ stature I’d say it was most likely a property line issue. Morris probably tried to build a still on Scott’s land or dumped leaves in his yard or something. The sneaky funniest part of this story is that he escaped to the garage aka a redneck safe house.

“The 52-year-old was able to finally escape when he entered his garage and shut the door.”

Like he couldn’t have just bulldozed through the door with his tractor. I hope the judge takes that into account when during sentencing. He should get half the time for a half-assed murder attempt.