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Bruce Springsteen Settles The Would You Rather Fight 100 Duck Sized Horses/1 Horse Sized Duck Question Once And For All

Like the end of Braveheart where William Wallace says never in his whole life did he swear allegiance to Longshanks and the only response from The Magistrate is, “It matters not, for he is your king.” Same deal here. You may not like him say “Bruce Can’t Singsteen” or make him a super Jew by spelling his name “Springstein”, but it doesn’t matter in the end, for he is your boss. And his word is golden.

The would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or 1 horse sized duck has been debated by pretty much everyone, including on KFC Radio, but now we at least have a definitive, scientific answer. The Boss would tame and herd the small horses to the point where they would be a bunch of lovable, young Epona’s from The Ocarina Of Time (still hold a closer bond with that horse than I do with most of my own family). Probably would teach them how to gallop in unison and add them to the band. But a duck sized horse? It’s been determined, as the man quotes, “A huge duck would fuck you up.” Argument settled for eternity.

Still don’t know why my #askbruce question wasn’t answered last night. Was counting on you, Fallon.