Monday Random Thoughts
1. It’s great to be back doing random thoughts. I’d like to thank Jamie Chisholm for a great job last week. Although I refuse to believe his report that the Flying Tomatoe is banging Lindsey Lohan. It just can't be true. Now before I unleash my ramblings on people there are few state of the union things I need to clear up. First of all, our next big event is our 2nd Annual March Madness Party at The Place. This starts at noon on the first day of the tournament which is Thursday March 16th. Personally this is my favorite Barstool Sports event of the year. I simply love the first day of the tourney. The bottom-line is that if you don’t take a half a day on this Thursday and join us at The Place then you’re a pussy. No man should work on the first day of the tournament. It is the best day of the year just to drink all day long,bet on hoops and just be a man And the best part is that the next day is St. Patrick’s Day so it makes for a great long weekend. I hope to see as many Stoolies there as possible.
2. Sticking with the March Madness for a minute, if you’re going to bet on the tournament please do so through our two online gambling sponsors. Both are legit and pay on time and all that great stuff. They are also huge supporters of the Stool and we want to keep them happy. So if you’re a friend of the Stool, please check out both these companies and pick the one you like the most. It is VIP Sports and The Greek. When you sign up with The Greek use the code “Bar” so they know that we sent you. And always remember that just checking out our advertisers websites let’s them know we are working for them.
3. Anybody see Coral from MTV host “The Casting Couch” which was a preview show for the new real world? What the f-ck? She looked like an alien with huge boobs or something.
4. One of the lasting images of the Olympics was snowboarder Lindsey Jacobelis hot-dogging it before the finish line and spilling her Dunkin Donuts coffee all over her premature celebrating ass. Just last week I argued that this may have been the worst case of premature celebration in the history of sport. That was before I saw this bike riding clip.
5. Ladies, who says all the good guys are taken? Just look at John Rocker’s match.com profile.
6. Well Bode Miller finished the Olympics in true Bode Miller fashion and that is by getting disqualified for strattling a gate 15 seconds into his final Slalom race. And thankfully this brings to an end one of the biggest American disgraces in the history of this country. I honestly wouldn’t mind if the State Department deported this guy to some 3rd world country or something. He is just such a freaking disgrace. And while we’re at it we should deport all the people who created the Joinbody.com advertising campaign for Nike which is still running everywhere. At some point don’t you have to pull those web ads and commercials? I mean the whole ad campaign is already a bust. Why embarrass yourself by still running all these spots? Nike should change it to Bodesucks.com. At least that would salvage some self respect for the company. And the thing that makes it so much worse is that Bode Miller himself doesn’t seem to care that he is such a fraud. He should donate all his sponsorship money to a charity. In my mind, the fact that Bode Miller accepted all these endorsement deals and can’t even finish a race makes him just a common criminal and he deserves to be thrown in jail. It’s like he ran a scam on the country.
7. Sticking with the Olympics, I have found the one thing that is more boring than Ice Dancing. And that’s Ice Dancing when it doesn’t even count. For some reason figure skating has exhibition events after the competition where the skaters just skate for the hell of it. Hmm, maybe that’s how it should be all the time? Let’s screw the judging and just make figure skating like Broadway shows. It would be like when the WWF admitted it was entertainment and not a real sport.
8. One of my biggest regrets about not doing random thoughts last week was that I couldn’t chime in about the weeklong American Idol marathon. But don’t worry, thanks to DVR I caught up on all the action this weekend. Let’s start with the elimination of the sexpot that is Becky O’Donohue. This chick flat out can’t sing and she had no business being in the competition from a vocal perspective. Her only chance was to wear virtually no clothing and shake her ass off. Somehow she didn’t understand this message as she tried to sing her way into the next round instead of whoring her way into the next round. 
And if that’s how she was going to dress and act then I’m glad she’s gone. The only person who got eliminated who I didn’t want to see go was the fat Barry Manilow guy. I know he had no chance at winning and belongs singing at a buffet on a cruise ship, but I actually liked him. He was fun to watch and was more interesting than lots of the dorky young guys who make me cringe. Yes, David Radford I’m talking to you. I puked 4 times before he got off the stage. There is nothing worse than guys who try to act cool when they’re clearly dorks. I still have night tremors from that blond Russian kid from last year who thought he was Tony Bennett.
Overall, I think this is by far the strongest American Idol field of all time. But there are clearly 6 people who are better than everybody else and will battle it out for the title. Here are the contenders; Taylor Hix, Mandisa, Parris Bennett, Katharine McPhee, Ace, and Chris Daughtry. Ayla Brown and Kelly Picker are two bubble teams who are on the outside looking in. And if Elliot Yamon wasn’t so damn ugly he’d have to be considered a threat, but he is the ugliest dude I’ve ever seen in my life. The two biggest surprises for me after the first show were Chris Daughtry and Parris Bennett. Both of them would have huge up arrows if this was Becketts. I just had no idea how good Daughtry’s voice is. He clearly has the best recording voice in the whole competition. If he can become a little more animated with his performance he could win the whole thing which I didn’t think was a real possibility going into the competition. And his voice may be good enough to carry him where he doesn’t even need to be a good performer to win. It’s that special. As far as Parris goes, I thought her weakness would be the fact that she is boring but that clearly wasn’t the case with her “Midnight Train to Georgia” performance. She has the whole package. My favorite overall performer is still Taylor Hix, but Chris Daughtry is pretty freaking good.
10. The front page of the Boston Herald yesterday had a big story about how Boston hookers are using Craigslist to advertise their “services” and find new clients.
According, to the story A two-week Herald investigation of free “erotic services” ads on the craigslist.org Web site uncovered prostitutes shacked up in hotels, operating from Spartan apartments rented by pimps or willing to meet for “car dates” in parking lots. Fees ranged from $50 to $250. Eight women advertising sex on craigslist in the past two weeks were contacted by the Herald by phone or e-mail. Meetings were arranged in 15 to 30 minutes. Three women used Hub hotels and one sought to park at the South Bay Plaza lot. They seemed to have varying levels of experience in the sex trade. When told upon meeting that the caller was a reporter, all but one of the women refused to be interviewed."
To be honest I’m not sure what the purpose of this article is. The Boston Phoenix and Weekly Dig pride themselves on finding ways for hookers to advertise their services. I don’t see the Herald doing a sting operation on them. And it’s not like these ladies of the night are trying to fool anybody.” “Erotic Services” is a pretty straight forward way of saying sex. If the Herald really wanted to write an interesting article they should have ranked how the hookers looked when they showed up for the meetings. This is information everybody could use.
Reader Email
Email #1
Prez,
It looks like the rest of the national media has caught up with you. Cutler’s shooting up the draft boards fast. So now we can start figuring out the timeline between BSS and the rest of the media. It looks like they’re about, oh, 3-4 months behind I think?
Thanks for the props. The beauty of the Stool is that when we say things 4 months before everybody else we always get emails saying we’re idiots because people haven’t heard anybody else say what we’re saying. But as I’ve said from the beginning, nobody watches more college football, college basketball or NFL than me. It’s humanly impossible.