Random Thoughts

NYPost - A man harboring a five-year gym-class grudge finally got revenge on his rival - brutally beating the stunned man at a high-school reunion organized through Facebook in a Gramercy Park bar, according to a lawsuit filed yesterday. Adam Lynn, 24, of Hoboken, NJ, says he was at the Proof Bar and Lounge early last Nov. 27 when he was attacked without provocation by Lucas Robak and Jacob Namer, according to his suit filed yesterday in Manhattan federal court. Lynn, a derivatives trader, remembered Robak from when his classmate picked a fight after a hotly contested gym-class handball game during their junior year, Fitch said.  Both Lynn and Robak were suspended for one day after exchanging blows in the school hallway.  So Lynn was surprised when Robak and Namer approached him on the bar's lower level, with Robak extending his hand in greeting, Fitch said.  But instead of shaking his hand, Robak allegedly grabbed Lynn and held him back. Namer then began pummeling him in the face, the suit says The beating left Lynn with injuries to his jaw that needed hospital treatment, and he is now suffering symptoms of temporomandibular joint disorder, a chronic and painful condition, Fitch said.

This dude can cry me a river.   Honestly what did he think was going to happen when his nemesis offered to shake his hand?   I mean everybody knows that old gym class handball rivalries die hard.   Five years is hardly enough time for the wounds to heal.  So only a fool wouldn’t have seen through this handshake trick.    It's page fucking 1 in the WWF handbook.  It’s almost like this guy was begging to get his face punched in and suffer Tempromandibular Joint Disorder which I’m pretty sure is a made up injury anyway.  

PS – What High School has a five year reunion?   I guess schools that play handball in gym class huh?   Bottom line is that everybody knows it’s 10 years or bust.

- Thanks to Mr. Mill City for the story

Detroit fans, your wish appears to have finally come true. The Lions have finally removed team president and GM Matt Millen from his post, FOXSports.com has learned, unseating one of the most criticized executives in Detroit sports history. Millen was informed of the move Tuesday night during a late-night high-level meeting... The Lions are an NFL-worst 31-84 since Millen took over in 2001. They have also been a model of futility on the road and Millen has gone through three head coaches, none of whom have been able to turn the Lions into a winner.

I have to admit, this is a pity. Sheer, total, complete incompetence was never as entertaining as it was with Matt Millen. Draft day will never be the same without him sitting on a top ten pick with a buffett of rock-solid, blue chip, can't-miss future Pro Bowlers available to him, and then watching him grab the best college wideout on the board. Cold Hard Football Facts has compiled a list of the wide receivers Millen drafted and the guys who he could've taken instead. Here's an abbreviated version:

• 2003: Charles Rogers, No. 2- Andre Johnson, Terance Newman, Troy Palomalu
• 2004: Roy Williams, No. 7- Ben Roethlisberger, Steven Jackson
• 2005: Mike Williams, No. 10- DeMarcus Ware, Shaun Merriman
• 2006: Calvin Johnson, No. 2- Joe Thomas, Laron Landry, Patrick Willis

Good picks all, because as every great GM will tell you, the proper way to build a winner is from the sidelines, in. Anyway, it's nice to see the Lions keep the futility ball rolling by firing Millen now in the middle of the season at a time when it's too late for a new GM to do anything about the current roster. And about three years after Lions fans started screaming for his head. It's a good reminder for all those ballsacks at Gillette who stamped their little feet and threw a hissy fit because the Pats had the audacity to lose a game about just how bad some other NFL teams are being run. Too bad Millen is gone, but at least we'll always have his Kodak moment with Pat Sullivan to remember him by.

LAS VEGAS, N.M.—Coaches at Robertson High School failed to adequately supervise boys at a football camp last month or look into allegations of sexual assault by other players, allowing more boys to fall victim, according to a report from district officials. After the allegations surfaced, six football players were suspended 10 days for violating the district's anti-bullying policy. Five subsequently were suspended through the end of the year; a sixth was expelled.

State police separately issued a 102-page report last week on the hazing, which involved allegations of sodomy with a broomstick. The police report said younger players were told to "take it like a man" and that their attackers ignored their pleas to stop.

Oh, puh-leeze. Can we once and for all put an end to the wussification of youth sports? "Boo hoo, they were hazing me. Waa waa they shoved a broomstick up my ass." What ever happened to letting boys be boys so they can grow up to be men? Back in the day, this sort of thing wasn't frowned upon, it was encouraged. Kids football has a long tradition of kids shoving common household products up each other's butts. It helps sift out the pretenders from the kids who are really serious about football. When Mike Ditka was trying out for his school team, the seniors crammed a mop up his sphincter, sponge first. Dick Butkus made the varsity as a freshman and played the entire season with Hoover upright lodged in his rectum. How are the prissy little momma's boys at Roberston supposed to handle the backside blitz if they can't deal with a little broom handle in the butt? If you can't "take it like a man" your crosstown rivals aren't going to listen to your "pleas to stop" either, panty waist. Las Vegas, N.M. is looking for winners. If you can't take it, go try out for field hockey.

With all the Heidi Watney love going around lately it's easy to sleep on Bianca "The Big Cat" De La Garza. But you won't catch me making that mistake. Bianca never takes a day off. I'm telling you right now that she is one of the most underrated pieces of ass in this city. I still have no clue how David Wade bagged her. My only complaint is that she didn't wear a cowboy hat to this hoedown like all the other chicks. She probably didn't want dudes beating off on the dancefloor or something. Always a lady...

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Ladies and gentleman, Welcome to the United States of America

SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va. (WSAZ) -- As if getting a DUI wasn’t enough, a man arrested for driving under the influence got in a lot more trouble at the police station. Police stopped Jose Cruz on Route 60 in South Charleston Monday night for driving with his headlights off.Then, he failed sobriety tests and was arrested. When police were trying to get fingerprints, police say Cruz moved closer to the officer and passed gas on him. The investigating officer remarked in the criminal complaint that the odor was very strong. Cruz is now charged with battery on a police officer, as well as DUI and obstruction.

Ah, the last refuge of a desperate man.  The old fart bomb.   Honestly who hasn’t been here before?   You’ve just been pulled over and failed a sobriety test.  You’re about to go to jail.  Your entire life is flashing before you.   The cops are moving in to finger print you.  Time is running out.  What options do you have left?  Yup, it’s time to rip a fart to end all farts and hope the stench is enough to ward the police off and give you time to escape.  It’s the type of non lethal resistance and quick thinking that Ghandi himself could be proud of.   Godspeed Jose Cruz.  Godspeed.

In what is rapidly becoming an annual event as dependable as the changing of the seasons around here, the Sox clinched another playoff birth and partied at Game On! after it was over. And once again the Stool delivers the photos. They aren't nearly as good as last year, but still pretty cool....

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Click Here for the answer

People.com: Singer Clay Aiken is following through on a promise he made to himself as a new dad: to publicly acknowledge that he's gay... Aiken says he expects the news may overwhelm some of his fans. "Whether it be having a child out of wedlock, or whether it be simply being a homosexual, it's going to be a lot," said Aiken... The born-again Christian singer also reveals how he told his mother Faye he's gay four years ago... "She started crying. She was obviously somewhat stunned."

I of course have nothing against gay people, but count me among the legion of Claymates who are "overwhelm"ed and just as "stunned" as Faye Aiken by this news. Who knew? Not that you can always tell, but how did Clay keep his sexuality under wraps for so long? I've seen some clips of him singing and dancing on Broadway and they gave me no indication he was gay. Is this common? I mean, is this going to be like when ex- NFLer Esera Tuaolo came out on "Real Sports" and there'll be rumors that there are other gay men in musical theater? I admit, Clay had me fooled. I feel like my mother when she found out Liberace was gay. Not that there's anything wrong with it...

How awkward was this interview? Poor Heidi Watney didn't know what to do. I think she was just waiting to get groped or something. But I ain't mad at Johnny Bench. Heidi would fuck me up too especially with that scarf on. She looked like she should be a leading lady in a romantic comedy or something. That is until she got soaked with Champagne and looked like she should be on Red Tube.

PS - Nice BU Hat.

(Talk to me Heidi!)

First of all, you know Big Papi was definitely hard during this interview when Watney was whispering sweet nothings into his ear, but that's neither here nor there. I give NESN an F for their post game coverage. I stayed up for like 2 hours waiting to see Heidi get drenched with champagne and got nothing. Instead all they kept showing was the fat bullpen cop get doused over and over and over again. Seems like a fair trade right? Seriously how is that possible? This should have been the first fucking thing they talked about during the production meetings. "Be there when Heidi gets wet." Not after the fact! Be there when it happens! Somebody deserves to get fired for this. And am I the only one that noticed Heidi interviewed everybody except Varitek. Coincidence I think not. NESN was probably afraid that Tek would push her head down and force her to blow him on live TV or something. Although I got to believe that would have been great for ratings.

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