Random Thoughts

- Thanks to Gaz for sending this along

The Bs continued their no-'expert'-saw-it-coming march toward some hometown hockey come Marathon Monday with their huge, no quit, come from behind 5-4 SO victory over a fragile, impending fire sale Panthers squad last night in sunny F-L-A, placing them 6th in the Wales. Down 4-2 going into the third, a virtual death knell for a team that scores about as often as the average comment poster, the Bs were able to overcome a couple of "Have you seen my baseball?" moments by the D to tie the game. Big Z's 7th PPG (12th overall) got them within one and the "European Buys" line of Big Looch (2nd in rookies with 125 hits), David Krejci (who is more overdue than the Pats are to cover...what? Too soon?), and Phil "Chiarelli better not fucking trade me, I'm only fucking 20" Kessel combined to knot the game and the team smelled blood. Sturmie's lone goal of the shootout proved the difference as Alex Auld, replacing a rare off-night Tank Thomas after the 2nd, stonewalled the three Panthers he faced. The win gives the team 7 out of 8 points on this current road trip which concludes tomorrow night at the Bs visit Mons Ven...I mean the dangerous yet bottom-dwelling Tampa Bay Lightning. More importantly, it gives long-suffering fans hope that Tom Petty isn't the only reason they're in the (fake) Garden when it's finally nice outside.

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Today Jeri Ryan turns 40, which officially removes her from "Hot Older Chick" status and graduates her to the top of the "Cougar" class. Good for her, she's held up well and she deserves it. Jeri still holds the world record for Nerd Ejaculations Produced, from her role as Seven of Nine in "Star Trek: Voyager." Her silver cat suit not only caused the sexual awakening of a generation of Magic: The Gathering players and saved the Trek franchise, it gave us all a reason to look forward to a future where we might possibly get assimilated by an evil alien collective.

After Trek of course, the FCC mandated that Jeri play the MILF/ aging seductress on at least one TV show at all times, from "Boston Public" to "The OC" to "Boston Legal" to "Shark," she's never disappointed. And she may very well have done nothing less than change the course of US history. She used to be married to a popular US Senator from Illinois. Weeks before he was to be re-elected (he was kicking ass in the polls and was a shoe-in to win) their divorce records, which had been sealed, were released to the world. And in them, Jeri had told the judge that her husband used to take her to sex clubs and tried several times to get her to swap with other couples and have sex with him in public. Sen. Ryan pulled out of the race in disgrace and his opponent breezed into office. And the opponent's name? Barack Obama.

Happy Birthday, Seven of Nine; you'll always be Nine out of Ten to me. Click here to see much more of her...

Today is a milestone day in the short history of the Smokeshow of the Day feature.  We have our first ever sister combination in the history of the Stool.    Natalie’s sister Monica already was a Smokeshow of the Day a couple weeks ago.   These chicks are like the Stastny brothers.    I think this is what people in the smut business call “good genes”

Feel free to send us smokeshow nominations.  It would kind of help to keep this thing going.    And don’t just send us the girl’s name either.  Tell them that it is their civic responsibility to get involved.  PS – BC girls who have been nominated are 0-3 in turning us down.  Pretty much the only girls who have said no are from the Heights.    Somebody needs to step up and save their reputation. Send nominations to randomthoughts@barstoolsports.com

Click Here For More Pics of Natalie

Now on principle I’m posting the last minute and a half of the Miracle On Ice because as everybody knows today is the 28th anniversary.  But the more important question is not how a bunch of college dudes kicked the crap out of the Soviet Union, but what type of bet did Al Michaels hit on that game?  I mean clearly he sounds excited at the end with the whole “do you believe in miracles”, but maybe Michaels wasn't necessarily talking about the game, maybe he was talking about hitting the under or something? 

My prediction was that he had USA hockey in part of a 3-team Olympic teaser that day with the Swiss curling team and the East German bobsledders.  What does that pay, 8-1?  That’s the only explanation I can come up with for why he’s that excited at the end of the game.  Nobody gets that fired up if they don't have at least a little something riding on the outcome, especially a known degenerate like Michaels.

Anyway as a side note, how on fire have I been with my Youtubes the last 2 days?  Today with the Miracle on Ice, yesterday with the Jamel Thomas 3.  It just doesn’t get any better than that.

Every time I get worked up about what some idiot wrote in the comment section of our blog I got to remind myself that this is who is on the other end. Unless I'm giving this kid too much credit. Unfortunately I'm dead serious.

As a reminder Abigail Clancy is some British chick who fucks soccer players or something like that. Anyway this is what she wore to an event called the Brit Awards. (I hear that's huge in Britian) Anyway, it looks like I can cross "Abigail" off the list of potential names that I could name my daughter if I ever have one. Because Abigail Clancy just slutted that name up forever in my mind.

PS - Just in case you want to see more Abigail, here is UB"s Wake Up with Abigail Clancy which I'm pretty sure is the best collection of Abigail photos on the web. I love how people are just starting to hear about this chick in the United States and UB did a wake up with her back in like 1984.

BEVERLY, Mass. -- A local man is accused of allegedly threatening to kill people at the Registry of Motor Vehicles.  Gary Woodbury, 52, allegedly told the employees at the RMV in Beverly that he would shoot them after he was denied a state issued ID Wednesday.  Woodbury says that he never threatened to shoot them and that this all a big misunderstanding. Woodbury also says that he does not own a gun nor has he ever applied for one.  "I told them their employer should line them all up and teach them how to do their job instead of shooting people out the door," Woodbury said. Woodbury was arrested and is facing two counts of threatening to commit murder

Does it really matter what Woodbury said?   If people got arrested every time they threatened to kill an RMV employee the entire state of MA would be in jail.   I mean I’d say I make death threats at least 40% of the time I go in there.    In fact I thought it was just understood that RMV employees don’t even start listening to you until you threaten to mutilate them.  That’s the only way to get their attention.   Saying I’m going to shoot you is the equivalent of saying “hello my name is Dave” to people who work at the Registry.   I thought everybody knew this.

Bostonherald.com - Big on-air shakeups are under way at two Boston TV stations - moves that have brought mixed emotions. WCVB-TV (Ch. 5) has switched up the anchor desk - morning through night. Former WFXT-TV (Ch. 25) weekend anchor and reporter Bianca de la Garza is Channel 5’s new early morning co-anchor. She’ll go up against her husband, David Wade, who delivers the morning news at WBZ. But a little competition is nothing new for this couple. The pair met while working as reporters for competing TV stations in Albany, N.Y. “We’ve done that before. He’s a big boy,” said de la Garza, who has been freelancing for Channel 5 since July. “For the first time in 10 years of us being together, we’ll have time off together with our daughter.”

I absolutely refuse to believe that there isn’t going to be some serious hate fucking going on at Wade/de la Garza household.    I mean Bianca already basically pissed in her husband’s eyeball with that “He’s a big boy” line.   That’s obviously code for I’m going to kick his ass all over the place and there ain’t a god damn thing he can do about it.   And you know what?  She’s right.  How the hell can David Wade compete with a smokeshow like Bianca de la Garza?  I give it two years before David Wade throws in the towel on this relationship.   There is just no way a man can be a man when his wife is dominating him in the workforce like this.   I mean if the First Lady was the Editor of Hustler or something I wouldn’t even be able to show my face in public. Or Spare Change for that matter.

Get your dancing/rioting shoes ready UMass. Last night's huge victory at URI should punch the Minuteman's ticket to the NCAA Tourney. And all Umass Alum and students are cordially invited to our 4th annual March Madness Party at the Place on Friday March 21st. At least we'll have one local team to root for.

Much more Sienna here...

Who do you want to Wake Up with? Ub@barstoolsports.com