Barstool Sports

Philly.com – The Phillies are making calls to gauge trade interest in All-Star pitcher Cole Hamels, according to CBSSports.com baseball insider Jon Heyman. Sources told Heyman that the Phillies “recently began making calls” about Hamels. Ken Rosenthal, of Fox Sports, said on his Twitter account: “Can confirm that #Phillies are calling teams on Hamels, asking for massive haul.” Hamels, 27, will become a free agent after this season. He is 10-4 this season with a 3.08 earned run average. In his 7-year Phillies career, he is 84-58 with a 3.37 ERA. He was the MVP when the Phillies won the 2008 World Series. He was drafted in the first round (17th overall) of the 2002 draft.

How have I never seen this picture before? Please let me know if I’m the idiot here, but this should be THE Cole Hamels picture. Every blog post, newspaper article, or CSN report on Cole Hamels should begin and end with this photograph. I swore I thought it was a joke for about 10 minutes.  Thought it was the work of some bored Photoshop kid’s weekend afternoon. The ol’ Make Cole Hamels Look Like A Pimply-Faced Old Timey 1920′s Baseball Player gag.  Nice one, internet.

But no — it’s real.  Look at this kid!  I just wanna have a catch with him and call him “Sport” and teach him about the dangers of loose women.  Rub his hat and mess his hair all up and tell him to wash his hands before mom finishes supper.  “Is that a slingshot in your back pocket, Cole?  You know what your mom thinks about you and that slingshot….”

Obviously dealing our most productive pitcher says volumes about where Ruben Amaro and the rest of the Phillies brass sees this club’s chances this year and going forward.  Obviously a Cole Hamels trade would have a massive impact on this team’s postseason chances as well as on the futures of most of this aging roster…but fuck. LOOK AT THIS PICTURE.  You can’t trade 28 year-old Cole after seeing this picture of 18 year-old Cole. No way.  We still gotta make sure he drinks all of his milk.