wsbtv – Elton Kim isn’t a Hollywood stuntman, but you wouldn’t know it based on the video he gave Channel 2 Action News that shows him clinging to the hood of a car speeding down Holcomb Bridge Road. “Very dangerous,” the Roswell dry cleaner told Channel 2’s Mike Petchenik of the situation. “I’m lucky, very lucky.” Kim told Petchenik the situation unfolded two weeks ago when he tried to confront a woman who had just backed into his wife’s SUV in the parking lot outside his dry cleaners. “I said ‘Stop it’ three times,” he said. “Then, I go to the front of the car.” Instead of stopping, Kim said the woman accelerated into him, and his instinct was to jump on the hood. As horrified witnesses watched, Kim said the woman took off down Holcomb Bridge Road for nearly 2 miles. “He could have been really hurt had he slipped off,” said his wife, Theresa. “I don’t think she intentionally wanted to hurt him, but for some reason she never stopped to say she was sorry.” Roswell police told Petchenik they intend to charge the driver with felony aggravated assault, if and when they find her. Police said her car had out-of-state plates, which, according to Kim, were from Alabama.
If you didn’t immediately think of Jackie Chan, you’re so racist that you won’t even allow yourself to make legit racial comparisons. Elton Kim clinging to the hood of a speeding car while yelling in broken English is the Jackie Chan-iest thing that has ever happened ever. Not saying that all Chinese guys sound or act like Jackie Chan; just saying this particular guy 100% does.
It’s like if you’re a white guy and see a black guy who looks like Chris Rock. Now, 99% of the time a white person saying “hey you look like Chris Rock” is racist and dumb because the guy probably doesn’t look a goddamn thing like Chris Rock. But then there’s always that 1%. There’s always that one time where the guy looks just like Chris Rock and you’re not a racist and everyone laughs and agrees.
This is that 1%. Chinese man clinging to a speeding car flying down the highway? JACKIE CHAN.