» PETA’s Panties Are In A Bunch Because Assassin’s Creed 4 Features Whaling Barstool Sports: Philly

PETA’s Panties Are In A Bunch Because Assassin’s Creed 4 Features Whaling

PETA - In Assassin’s Creed 4: Black Flag, players will be able to engage in whaling, the practice of hunting, well, whales. PETA released a press release, which read: “Whaling–that is, shooting whales with harpoons and leaving them to struggle for an hour or more before they die or are hacked apart while they are still alive–may seem like something out of history books, but this bloody industry still goes on today in the face of international condemnation, and it’s disgraceful for any game to glorify it. PETA encourages video game companies to create games that celebrate animals–not games that promote hurting and killing them,” the company also stated.

Ah, PETA, the Westboro Baptist Church of men who are hated by their fathers and women whose pussies actually give shelter to felines. The only organization in the world who would fight for the rights of fake computer imaged whales in a video game that also features rape, murder and pillage on the high seas. Plus it’s nice to see PETA endorses the historical accuracy of the Assassin’s Creed franchise. Don’t get me wrong, the Assassin’s Creed games are the certified tits, but I doubt the half Indian/half English son of the Templar in the third game really was the catalyst in every single event in the Revolutionary War. Crispus Attucks desperately needs that street cred for the Boston Massacre in homie heaven.

Go back to being somewhat useful with those banned commercials with tits and vegetables that look perfect for pleasuring.

By smitty posted March 6th, 2013 at 9:35 AM

Top 2 Comments

8 comments Sort by Popularity Sort by Date

Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by donkeypuncharillo on March 6, 2013 at 9:43 am
Again, why is smitty not blogging more? I'd take this one piece of writing over four Maurice blogs that resemble a Rosie Odonnell Indian food dump to the chest any day
- Up: 12
- Down: 1
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by dcubbz on March 6, 2013 at 10:02 am
"Rosie Odonnell Indian food dump to the chest," think that takes the title for most insulting sentence of all time. Donkey punch on, my friend.
- Up: 4
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by thepostman on March 6, 2013 at 10:06 am
I didn't half of those nerd jokes, but I like the topic. Good effort, B.
- Up: 1
- Down: 2
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by wilburham on March 6, 2013 at 10:06 am
donkeypunch take a lap bro
- Up: 0
- Down: 11
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by donkeypuncharillo on March 6, 2013 at 10:11 am
Lol @wilburham just cut and paste what I said to you and add "bro".
- Up: 7
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by godshatesislandersfans2 on March 6, 2013 at 10:27 am
I practice whaling every weekend at the bar. Thank God PETA hasn't caught on yet
- Up: 5
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by notorious ec on March 6, 2013 at 7:25 pm
Get rid of Mo
- Up: 1
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by flemish on March 7, 2013 at 12:04 am
If animals aren't meant to be eaten, then why are they made of food?
- Up: 0
- Down: 0