Barstool Sports

GERMANY – Grzegorz Wieczorek was reciting a prayer when he stopped mid-sentence and collapsed at the altar, the Münchner Merkur newspaper reported on Tuesday. The 47-year-old hit his head on the stone floor of the St. Lambert church at the Seeon Monastery. Panicked guests ran to try to help him at the front of the church, while organist Andrea Wittmann called an ambulance and found the first-aid kit. “It was like something out a movie,” she told The Local. A local pastor jumped in to marry the couple at a local church an hour later.

Is anybody really surprised here? Nothing is more ruthless than a bride on her wedding day. Nothing. They’re like Hitler with a box. It’s their day and heaven help everyone if something goes wrong, they’re getting married and having fun. You think some old preacher buying the farm is going to stop the broad from getting hitched? Hell no. Her fiancee could’ve dropped dead there and she would’ve wed his corpse. An Aurora situation could have went down and she would not leave te alter before she officially has her man’s soul and balls officially for life. Shit, the groom could have dropped his pants, cut off his dick and then use it as a mic to lip sync Jump Around back down the aisle and she would just say pull your pants up and I Do. Nothing is stopping a woman from it being the best day of her life.