Barstool Sports

PFT – With a sky-high level of popularity, the sky’s the limit for Jets backup quarterback Tim Tebow. And lurking among the clouds could be political office. “I haven’t ruled it out,” Tebow tells Rich Cimini of ESPNNewYork.com. “Whatever avenue I feel like I can make a difference in, I’d love to do. I haven’t ruled out anything like that. It won’t be anytime soon in my future, but it’ll be something I’ll at least look at and consider one day.” Plenty of football players have gotten involved in politics after their careers ended. Few if any enjoyed the mainstream appeal of Tebow, who continues to draw headlines even as his football skills slide (for now) into irrelevance. Could Tebow eventually be the first former NFL player who becomes president? The fact that he was born in the Philippines to a pair of U.S. citizens could give rise to legal challenges and interpretations.

In a goddamned LANDSLIDE. That’s exactly how Tim Tebow would win the general election for the American Presidency. Wouldn’t even be close. Tebow’s opponent could be a free bag of money that also doubles as a blowjob machine and Timmy would still dominate at the polls. Republican Party or Democratic Party– doesn’t matter. It could be the Black Panther Party. The people yearn for President Tebow and Jesus is just the God to deliver that miracle.

And don’t think because Tim Tebow was born in the Philippines that he’ll be stopped from becoming our Commander in Chief. Nobody will care. All the Birther people who were clamoring for Obama’s long-form birth certificate will be too frozen by Tebow’s kind eyes and genuine zest for life to give a shit. “Pre-marital sex is now punishable by 50 lashes? Whatever your say, Mr. President. Could you just smile for us once more and tell us how excited you are about the international economy?”

America probably wouldn’t make it past those four years but I’ll be damned if it wouldn’t be worth it.