WALES – A man who made thousands of random nuisance calls on his mobile phone made some bizarre comments to his victims. Bachelor Gareth Owen Lloyd, 49, told those who answered that he had his penis stuck in various objects. He told one shocked woman that his penis was stuck in a jam jar and another that it was stuck in a vacuum cleaner. He was arrested and his phone was found to have made about 5,800 calls in just over a two month period.
By the looks of him I wouldn’t doubt if Gareth Owen Lloyd actually got his dick stuck in a vacuum cleaner once or twice in his life. Happens to the best of us. The photo of this chap is seriously worth more than a thousand words. No good looks, no money for decent clothes, a slight case of the downs. All that Gareth has in in the world is a dick and time. What else is he supposed to do to occupy his days? Get a real job? Fuck that. Not when there’s a jam jar that needs to be raped. Not on Gareth’s watch. Just keep him away from the toaster.