Worried the dessert desperados have their eyes on your favorite ice cream flavor? Hate to leave home for fear of cold-hearted pint-nappers? Tired of vain attempts to conceal your favorite passion behind the frozen peas? Ben & Jerry’s wants YOU to breathe easier!
The all-new Euphori-Lock from Ben & Jerry’s is designed to promote family harmony – and salvage your peace of mind!
I saw this a couple days ago and seeing it again just reminded me of how irrationally angry this made me. Do you think I’m stupid, Ben & Jerry? Short of leaving a passive-aggressive note, I don’t think there’s anything that could infuriate me more than seeing this dumbass contraption in my freezer. I don’t care if it was put there by my own mother, if I ever see one of these I’m eating that ice cream out of spite. Even if it has coconut or something else gross in it. A man’s gotta have principles, and Ben & Jerry thinking I won’t knife the fuck out of the bottom of that container and have my way with every delicious spoonful is against my principles.