Credit Where Credit Is Due, Taylor Hall Broke The Philadelphia Flyers Men’s Professional Ice Hockey Team

To set the scene for you, this play dates back all the way to Saturday, February 18. It’s the last time the New Jersey Devils won a professional ice hockey game. Since then, it was 10-straight losses for the Devils. 10 in a row.¬†LLLLLLLLLL Bean. Meanwhile, the Flyers blanked the Penguins 4-0 on Wednesday night. So anybody with at least half a brain knew that you could put your entire life on the Devils coming out with a regulation win last night because that’s just how this shit goes.¬†You got some guys in a scoring slump? Play the Flyers and they’ll get a hat trick. Team hasn’t won in nearly a full month? Play the Flyers and you’ll look like a Cup contender. However, nobody could have seen this one coming.

Shayne Gostisbehere?

taylor-hall-goal-ghost

Dead.

Steve Mason?

taylor-hall-goal-mason

mason-injured

Dead. Maybe even double dead.

Just as filthy as it gets from Taylor Hall, who left a waking path of destruction behind him. Flyers head into the 3rd period only down by 1. But just a minute 30 into the final frame, Taylor Hall stomps on their throats and rips off their dicks. As a Flyers fan who lives his life in a constant state of despair, clearly I don’t enjoy this. Clearly I’m not a fan of what just went down. With that being said, I’m a super duper serious journalist. And it is my job to love and respect all displays of dangleness. So putting my biases aside here and looking at this as objectively as my journalistic brethren at such media outlets like MSNBC and Fox News, I have concluded that this goal deserves a 10/10 for both it’s beauty and it’s violence. A double homicide and a filthy dangle. Doesn’t get much better than that.

@BarstoolJordie

 

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