Huff - A couple’s wedding was delayed after a man allegedly cut off his testicles before storming into a church just an hour before the ceremony was to take place. The Brentwood, U.K. man was taken to a hospital Saturday shortly after his self-mutilation, according to News.com.au. As a vicar and florist put finishing touches to the church, the unnamed man stormed in, throwing chairs around as he soaked the floor in his blood. A wedding guest who arrived early told the Brentwood Weekly News that the vicar would not let him enter the church because a man had cut off his testicles with a pair of scissors. “When I went in the church, I saw something on the floor which I could only describe as flesh, which I thought was part of his arm but that was one of his testicles,” the wedding guest said. After being taken to a hospital, police referred the man to a mental health assessment, according to the Brentwood Gazette. Despite Essex Police wishing to close the church to further investigate the incident, the wedding went along a half hour later. The bride was not informed what caused the delay until after the wedding.
Can’t believe the groom still went through with this wedding. Talk about a fucking omen. Some dude cuts off his balls and storms the church where you’re about the get married? Dude, get the fuck out of there. Take off the tux and run. Don’t look back. When random guys are murdering their own ballsacks an hour before you’re supposed to get handcuffed to one vagina for the rest of your life, something has got to be wrong. Not a good sign for your future happiness/sex life, that’s all I can say.