Barstool Sports

(Newser) – If Amanda Bynes’ scary driving issues and deteriorating mental health have you thinking of another former child star, you’re not the only one. Yes, even Lindsay Lohan is apparently reminded of Lindsay Lohan when she reads about Bynes’ troubles, as evidenced by this tweet from LiLo: “Why did I get put in jail and a nickelodeon star has had NO punishment(s) so far?” Shockingly, we have to agree with La Lohan on this one, although to be fair, Bynes has thus far avoided implication in any jewelry thefts. Lohan aired the sentiment shortly after news broke that Bynes—whose license is suspended—was pulled over yet again yesterday. Her car, at least, got impounded this time, E! reports. Prior to that, Bynes was photographed driving Thursday night with her face covered, which is probably about as safe as it sounds. But she insists she’s fine and totally not crazy, TMZ reports. She also denies smoking pot while driving, and says the pipe she was pictured with in her car actually contained tobacco. Which sounds likely.

Lohan and Bynes are like Arod and Jeter the past few years. When Arod strikes out with 2 men on in the bottom of the 7th, its the end of the world. He’s the worst baseball player in history. The WFAN lines blow up with people saying they should waive him and trading him for a left handed relief pitcher. Thats like Lohan. She’s had such a long history of fucking up behind the wheel and throughout life in general, so the littlest slip up and she’s back to the clink.

Bynes on the other hand, as of right now, is like Jeter. Still kinda getting a free pass because everyone is still like “Amanda Bynes? From Nickelodeon? All That? The Amanda Show? Nooo. Can’t be.” Thats like Jeter’s squeaky clean image. Its the selective memory that make people just call him forever clutch while Arod is always the goat. I’m sure when Jeter strikes out with the bases loaded and the game on the line Arod would love to tweet “How come nobody is saying the Captain choked?” Just like Lohan wants Bynes in the pen. Sorry, Linds. In the world of clutch baseball and drunk driving actress whores, selective memory rules all. Perception is reality.

PS – I don’t think I’ve ever been more right about anything in my life than Amanda Bynes’ meltdown. I saw this coming a mile away. Before the summer even started I knew she was about to go on destructive whorish tear back in May. I said 2 months for a full meltdown, looks like it was a little closer to 3.