- Police in a district in India’s Madhya Pradesh state are being paid to grow moustaches because bosses believe it makes them command more respect. Ten policemen in the northern state are already receiving 30 rupees (66 US cents) every month for their efforts. Jhabua district police chief Mayank Jain told BBC News Online: “The response is growing and in the months ahead we expect to see more moustachioed policemen. “Moustaches are improving the personalities of our constables. They are acquiring an aura of their own. They are creating a positive impression on the local people and getting a lot of respect.” The police chief hit upon the idea of moustaches-for-cash after a seminar attended by district policemen and local people. “There were two or three moustachioed constables in the gathering and I saw people were looking at them very respectfully and pleasantly. That is when I thought of making more policemen grow moustaches,” Mr Jain said. The decision to pay them a whisker more every month for their efforts was just a “little motivation”, he said. Mr Jain said he was keeping a watch on the shape of the moustaches so that they did not look too intimidating, and so have the opposite effect on people. “It takes time to keep a proper moustache. A good one has to take a turn near the angle of the upper lip,” Mr Jain said. He said that in the next few months many more of the 1,100 policemen at the district’s 22 police stations would begin sporting moustaches.
I think we can all agree that Mayank Jain is spot on, correct? If I’m a bad guy and I have the choice of a mustachioed police officer coming after me or a non-mustachioed police officer coming after me, I’m taking non-mustachioed every day of the week and twice on Wednesdays. And I’m not talking bout some jerk off cop sporting a dirty sanchez or something. I’m talking about a Tom Selleck, Magnum PI stache. Like Police Cheif Mayank says, that shit takes time and effort. And apparently costs about 66 cents a month. For just 2 cents a day you can sponser your very own Indian police stache. Bet you crime is down like 800% in India. And bitches are going for mustache rides left and right.