NYP - A wolf pack of drunken young women “acting stupid” on a downtown No. 6 train in Manhattan stabbed a 63-year-old man early today — for having had the nerve to ask them to pipe down, police said. The man was on his way to work at about 6:15 a.m. when he was attacked as the train entered the East 23rd Street station, a law-enforcement source told The Post. “The eight females were acting stupid. He just told them, ‘Relax. Calm down,’ ” another source said. Instead, one stabbed him in the left shoulder. He was treated at Bellevue Hospital. The women were arrested as they exited the 23rd Street subway station near Gramer¬cy Park. Seven of them, ages 17 to 20, were charged with gang assault, disorderly conduct, riot¬ing, criminal possession of a weapon, menacing, and felony assault. A 15-year-old girl was not charged. Cops added that they recovered a knife. A city bus driver who witnessed their arrest said the women, beers in hand, were yelling, “We didn’t do anything!” as they were being cuffed. The suspects were dentified as Shanice Brown, 20, Starmeik Driggins, 19, Kimberly Molina, 20 and Sheyla Figueroa, 18, all from Brooklyn; Michelle Rodriguez, 19, from the Bronx; and Martha Bermudez, 17, and Sha-fteva Burdos, 17, from Queens
What are the chances the chick with the sagging pants and the afro was “Sha-fteva?” One hundred percent? Five hundred percent? There has never been a better Sha-fteva in the history of black names. I don’t even quite know how to say it. ShahF tee va? All at once like ShahF-tuhvah? That F is really throwing me for a loop.
Anyway I guess the lesson to learn here is that when a drunk pack of hoodrats are acting unruly on the subway, ask them their names first before your tell them to calm down and relax. If they have normal names, proceed with your request for them to be quiet. If they have names like Starmeik and Sha-fteva, you might wanna just put up with their hooting and hollerin so that you don’t get stabbed.