What Kind Of Weird Hippie Shit Are Knicks Faith Vigil Candles?
Dark times call for bright measures. Win a limited edition set of our #knicksfaith candles http://t.co/qIUK9jw1vp pic.twitter.com/WJ3GxVgFRT
— Triangle Offense (@Tri_Offense) February 23, 2015
This looks to be something right out of a Zen Master acid trip. Lighting some candles and incense to scare away the bad spirits and clean up all the bad juju in the Knicks franchise while singing Kumbaya. Telling the scrubs on this active roster to try to “Please the Basketball Gods:”
Well guess what, Phil? That shit just ain’t going to happen. If you want real change at Madison Square Garden, the Basketball Gods ask that you burn James Dolan. Alive. As he has that fucking kazoo in his mouth. Hell, maybe even burn Isiah Thomas and Eddy Curry too. But until you get rid of Dolan, zip zero is going to change.
If I am going to light a candle in my house, you bet your ass it is going to smell like some sort of dessert. Vanilla cupcake, chocolate chip cookies, or of course, everyone’s favorite, buttercream. I couldn’t tell you the first thing about buttercream other than the Yankee Candle version of it could make the smell of any college party go away after just a few hours of burning. Worth every penny, every time.
Now I will insert the obligatory Candles By Jan clip from The Office here. For my money, The Dinner Party is the best episode in the show’s history. “You took me by the hannnnd. You made me a mannnn. That one night, you made everything alllllriiiiight.”