ABC- Chinese state media say two girls have died after eating poisoned yogurt placed outside their kindergarten at the direction of the head of a rival school. The Xinhua News Agency says police believe the poisoning was motivated by competition for students between the schools. It says the woman confessed that she injected the yogurt with rat poison and asked a man to place it with notebooks on the road to the rival kindergarten in Pingshan county in Hebei province. Xinhua said Thursday that the girls’ grandmother found the books and yogurt and took them home on April 24. The children suffered convulsions after drinking the yogurt and died later. Xinhua said police detained the woman and the man. Police referred queries to Pingshan county’s information office. Calls there rang unanswered.
OK China. We get it. You love your academic superiority almost as much as you hate people having children that don’t have a penis. But holy shit, guys. Maybe when kids start dying because of an interschool rivalry it’s time to take a second and reevaluate where things have ended up. I love me a rivalry as much as the next guy, but you need to understand the difference between drawing a dick on your opponent’s football field with weed killer and calling in a threat to put the school on lockdown and then pumping carbon monoxide into the vents. If this is what they’re doing to kindergarteners I can’t even imagine some of the shit high schoolers have to look forward to. On a totally unrelated note, if any high ranking Chinese officials are reading this I would gladly increase America’s debt to China by at least $100 for a livestream of a real life Battle Royale.
PS- As far as I’m concerned, unless she has dementia the grandmother who saw yogurt on the side of the road and thought that it was a good idea to bring it back to her house is as responsible as the people that actually made up the plan in the first place.