The only way this could be better is if Faulk wore his elbow pads on stage then Rock Bottomed Goodell (who isn’t there anymore but whatever, go with it) then threw one of those into the stands before dropping a People’s Elbow on him. Just a fucking perfect move from a perfect man. The jersey, the swagger, the “… AND TOM BRADY,” the crowd booing…. it’s all amazing. I’m all boned up over here. Get Kevin Faulk his red jacket and get this man enshrined in the Patriots Hall of Fame right this second. While we’re at it, let’s hit him with the Medal of Honor too, just save everyone some time and kill two birds with one stone seeing as they’re both inevitable anyway.
And Joe Thuney, you’re a linebacker now. Sorry man, if that’s what Kevin says then that’s what you are, rules are rules.]]>
Somewhere Derek Fisher thought he was just going to have a quiet Friday night where maybe he steals someones girl or two. He may be looking over his shoulder for Barnes to strike at any moment but theres no shot he saw it coming from Michael fucking Kay.
People probably didn’t think Kay had it in him but you have to remember, he’s from the Bronx. Given the shot, he’ll turn into NLCS KFC in a second. We’re all animals deep down.
PS: There’s a real chance Barnes hears this and doesn’t get its a joke so he just kills Kay.]]>
The Johnny Football Revenge Tour starts…
now just as soon as that grand jury indictment is cleared up. And he finds a team to play on. But then it’s on.
There’s an old saying that you can’t win a division in April but you can lose one. I’m not saying the the next week will definitely decide the rest of the Yankees season, but it sure as shit can. We start tonight in Boston against Henry Owens in his 2nd start of the season. Owens is the 8th lefty the Yankees have seen in their last 10 games which could mean they have a comfort level but with them not hitting at all lately there isn’t too much to read into this. However, Henry does have an 0-2 record with a 13.5 era against the Yankees so if there was ever a chance to break out of this slump, tonight is the night and we need it.
After these 3 games in Boston the Yankees head to Baltimore for 3 games before hosting the Red Sox back in The Bronx next weekend. There is still plenty of season to go and the Royals are in town right behind the Rex Sox but this week can go 3 ways.
It will be a long and stressful week for Yankee fans but with a day off yesterday the team should be relaxed heading into tonight. In 7 starts Tanaka is 4-2 with a 5+ era against the Sox and 2-1 with a 6+ era in Fenway but if he really is our ace, it all starts with him tonight. His stats against Boston say we’ll need a bunch of runs to win and lately we haven’t seen that so it time for the lineup to step up and Tanaka to prove himself on a big stage.
PS: I’ll be on WFAN late night after the Saturday game so if you are up late tune in. I’ll tweet out the details.
Have a great weekend everybody!]]>
I blogged a look-a-like yesterday and while I surely don’t intend to make this a thing, this one was too spot on. I’m not even talking about the nose and grossness, thought those are on point, I’m just talking about this fish’s general disposition. Two peas in an aqua pod who are just sad and devastated and hate everything. Unless I’m using that “smile to fool yourself into being happy” trick, that’s my face. Therefore this is probably the meanest tweet ever. “Hey John, you look like a scary sea creature who keeps trying to drown himself and it just won’t work. Boom, roasted.”]]>
What a song. What a song.
Don’t forget, TJ Oshie shirts are on sale
Have a good weekend folks]]>
Introducing Rachel from Zona…have a good one.