Pornhub and Youporn Unite To Answer The World’s Most Important Question – Boobs Or Butt?

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How about YouPorn and PornHub teaming up for the sake of knowledge and education? For the sake of science. Two great titans of the porn game putting their differences aside and coming together to answer one of the world’s great mysteries –

Boobs or Butt?

Lets get one thing straight – if you’re a Boobs Guy, you’re a child. Plain and simple. Like tits over ass is just a childish, childish opinion. You probably still say “boobies” being dead ass serious. You probably liked suckin on your mama’s and then you just never grew up. When you first start watching porn its all about the boobs – they’re always at eye level and you havent really grown to understand the female ass yet. You just wanna see some nipple. The Forbidden Areola is all you care about.

And then you actually get your hands on some ass and, if you’re a grown man, its over. I specifically remember the moment I became an Assman. It was 7th grade English. Ms. Pavlik’s class. This girl with a fat ass named Lauren leaned forward and I saw a pink g string up in between those cheeks and it was a wrap. From that moment on I was like I NEED to see where that string goes. I NEED to get up in there. Now I never did get ass from Lauren but I did find myself a girlfriend who was a couple years older who was into butt stuff and I never looked back. Anyway, once you’ve grabbed some ass and spanked some ass and had some ass banging off your hips and shit, there’s just no competition. Once you’ve had doggystyle sex and been able to stare at a chick’s b-hole for a few minutes, there’s no way you cant be an Assman. Tits are fun, for sure. TF’ing is a fun little novelty. Squeezing and jiggling and tossin em around is enjoyable, but its all just fun and games. The Ass is all about business. And thats the difference – tits are a fun extra, ass is a must have.

Which is why all the weirdo states in America are all about boobs. Buncha weird, underdeveloped children suckin on titties trying to stay warm in the snow. Seriously there is not a single legitimate state that I take seriously out of all the Boobs States.

And how about Argentina being a Boob Country???? What the fuck is that about??? What a cryin shame. Lets trade a bunch of cornfed, fat, white American girls with big tits for some Argentinian asses. Its a win-win for everyone!

Vote 1 for Boobs Vote 10 for Ass

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