Miami Zombie Attack Victim "Living Happily" 1 Year After Incident

MIAMI — Doctors say the homeless victim who lost his eyesight and most of his face in a bizarre attack last Memorial Day weekend is playing the guitar and following the Miami Heat as he continues to recover. Ronald Poppo, 66, is “living happily and adjusting to his new life,” according to a press release from doctors at Jackson Memorial Perdue Medical Center, a long-term care facility where Poppo has been since about a month after the attack. “He’s had a long year, but has managed to cope quite well,” Jackson Memorial Hospital plastic surgeon Dr. Woody Kassira told the media at a press conference Tuesday morning, describing Poppo as “a pleasure to work with.” He has also put on roughly 50 pounds and has learned to dress and feed himself, shower and shave after working with an occupational therapist. Poppo’s caregivers released a video of Poppo thanking the community “for contributing and helping out. People in my predicament need to be helped out..I’ll always be grateful for that.”

How about fucking Ronny Poppo? Just “Living happily.” Hanging out playing the guitar and watching the Heat. Unbelievable. Bro your face was ripped off by an asshole on bath salts. You have every right to be the biggest prick in the whole world. If this shit happened to me I’d be the biggest dick ever. I’d do absolutely whatever I wanted, whenever, wherever. I’d get absolutely everything I asked for. Because why? Because somebody ate my face off and playing that card trumps all other cards.

I guess the reality of the situation is this dude was homeless though. I mean its obviously awful he has no eyes anymore and can’t see. But its not like he was some heart throb and his good looks were ruined and his life will never be the same. He was homeless. Had nothing going for him as it was. Not like he was cleaning up with the ladies and now after the attack they won’t look his way. Bottom line is I’d probably rather be living in the care of the hospital getting all sorts of donations than laying on the streets, no? Get your face eaten and live on easy street the rest of your life instead of being starving on the streets – thats the question.