Instagram Account Of Miserable Men Shopping With Their Women Is As Depressing As It Gets
Probably the most relatable collection of pictures I’ve ever seen. Almost every dude on the planet can sympathize with these poor bastards. Shopping with a chick is top 5 worst thing that women make you do. Its somewhere in between them making you promise monogamy and going down on them. Its just such a soul crushing experience. You literally follow them around like a little lap dog, carry their shit like a butler, and spend the entire afternoon thinking about all the other shit you’d rather be doing. Your only respite is an empty chair in a shoe store where you get to rest your aching, failing legs. You can literally feel your manhood being sucked right out of your eye sockets. When you were a kid and your mom took you shopping, you made the best out of it. Ran around and hid inside all the clothes hanging on the rack. If you had a sibling you played hide and seek in that shit. If you were lucky, your mom would take you by the video game section where they had sample games to play. But as a grown man, you just lose like 3 months off your life for every 3 hours spent in the mall.
Its not a game either, ladies. Its why some guys jump to their fucking death rather than shop one more minute. Its that awful of an experience. Lets take a look at some of the best of this account. The guys who were right on the verge of suicide:
By far the most pathetic of the bunch. Sitting indian style right on the ground surrounding by your girlfriend’s shit. Didn’t even wait to find a chair. Just gave up on life and sat on the floor like a child. Thats what happens – you revert back to a childlike state.
The Holy Grail of shopping relief is a bed store. Most men will have too much pride to completely succumb and go horizontal. Those men suffer from a severe case of hubris. Take the nap when you can.
This guy might have been dead.
These three definitely are
Zero percent chance this dude had a spouse of any sort. Hes just trolling the mall for his next victim.
Could just be a hillbilly on a bender. We’ll never know the truth
This displays an important paradox about shopping with girls. Look at this guy’s shoes. He clearly appreciates high fashion. He probably loves shopping for himself. But when you’re just being dragged around with your girlfriend, its totally different. Coma inducing boredom in the girls bike section.
Let sleeping dogs lie. This guy and his Birkenstocks were one more shoe store away from jumping off the balcony. His wife is nowhere to be found because she knows she pushed him too far.
This guy definitely expected his wife to be dead by this stage in his life. Nope. Been getting dragged to the mall for like 40 years now.
Maybe the most disrespected of the bunch. Wife pretending you literally aren’t even there. Draping shit right in your face like you’re some sort of mannequin. No doubt this couple is divorced now.