NY Times – Under his watch, New York City has required food chains to post calorie counts, eliminated trans fats from restaurants and fought unsuccessfully to limit the size of a soda. Still, even as his days in office are numbered, Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg continues his campaign against obesity, this time by urging New Yorkers to take the stairs. Mr. Bloomberg said on Wednesday that he had issued an executive order requiring city agencies to promote the use of stairways and use smart design strategies for all new construction and major renovations. Mr. Bloomberg has also proposed two bills that would increase visibility and access to at least one staircase in all new buildings around the city. This would include putting up signs on the walls, especially near elevators, with one central injunction: take the stairs. “I’m not here to tell you how to live,” Mr. Bloomberg said at a news conference, adding that New Yorkers live close to three years more than the national average and three years longer than they did a dozen years ago. “But we must be doing something right.” The effort to bring attention back to the stairs follows a series of steps by Mr. Bloomberg to improve the general health of New Yorkers, a defining feature of his 12-year tenure. It started as far back as 2003, when Mr. Bloomberg outlawed smoking in bars and restaurants, and eventually at parks and public beaches. Then he banned the use of trans fats in restaurants and forced food chains to publish the calorie count for their standard menu items. This was coupled with pushes to lower sodium consumption, reduce the din of the city and encourage alternative forms of transportation like biking.
“I’m not here to tell you how to live,” Mr. Bloomberg said.” Uhhhh yes you are, dude. That is, quite literally, all you do. Its all you’ve basically done for your entire 12 year run. Told us what to eat, what to drink, what to carry the food or drink in, where to do it, where not to do it, and tell us how much we’ll be paying to do it all. And I’ll tell you where I draw the line, and thats taking the fucking stairs. Taking the stairs is the worst. Anything higher than 3 floors and I will wait for like 30 minutes for the elevator. The ban on smoking bars was actually pretty solid. The soda ban never really stuck. I drink the same size sodas I always did. I still put salt on my food and I don’t give a fuck if my drink is served in styrofoam. But the Crusade to Take The Stairs is where I say enough is enough. Redesigning buildings to shove stairs in my face. Fuck you, Bloombito! What about the hard working men and women of the elevator industry! They put their blood sweat and tears into creating traveling boxes to carry fat out of shape people like me high into the air. And you have their nerve to spit in their face with this “Take the stairs” bullshit.
Get the fuck out of my city, Bloomberg.
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