Orlando Sentinel- 551-pound former pharmacist, confined to 30 months of house arrest for his role in a massive South Florida pill mill ring, now wants his sentence reduced. His argument: He’s too heavy to leave home anyway, so house arrest is unnecessary. The federal judge who sentenced him, however, U.S. District Judge Kenneth Marra of West Palm Beach, was unmoved by that logic. In a crisp order, Marra on Monday denied the request. “Defendant was spared a prison sentence, not as a favor to him, but in order to spare the Bureau of Prisons the burden of having to care for him,” the judge wrote. Steven Goodman, 70, received the sentence in August 2012 for supplying more than 1 million oxycodone and other prescription pills to “pain management” clinics run by Wellington twins Christopher and Jeffrey George. The brothers are serving 14 and 15-and-a-half years respectively for disbursing illegal pills at clinics in Fort Lauderdale, West Palm Beach, Boca Raton and Wilton Manors.
Full disclosure: I read that story no less than 10 times and I’m still not sure what’s going on. This fat fucker wants his 30 month house arrest sentence reduced using the logic that he can’t leave the house anyway, ya know because he’s huge, so why even call it house arrest? Did I get that right? That makes zero sense. If you can’t leave the house anyway wouldn’t you not care about the house arrest as opposed to the other way around? That seems logical. And hey, house arrest sounds like the shit. You’re literally not allowed to leave your house. Fatty isn’t appreciating how great that is. There’s nothing outside that’s worth seeing. Trust me. It’s nothing but awkward encounters and people who suck. You’re probably saying, “But Trent. You’re a blogger and you’re fat and you never have to leave the house either.” While 2/3 of those thing is true the leaving the house part isn’t. Sure I don’t have to leave the house for work but I still have to leave to go grocery shopping and other stuff I don’t want to do. And I still have to go to social gatherings I don’t want to attend. “Sorry, I’m on house arrest” is the best excuse to get out of a lame party or birthday celebration of somebody you don’t actually like. This guy shouldn’t be trying to get less house arrest, he should be trying to get more. Be a lazy fat fuck the right way for me one time please.
you clean up well Trent.
If Trent ate Big Cat thats the sort of man gunt he’d have
ten times, huh trent? long live barstool iowa! great hire.
” You’re probably saying, but trent, You’re a blogger and you’re fat and you never have to leave the house either.” – Comment section starting to get under your eczema covered skin, Trent?
“This fat fucker”…fat on fat hate, like you read about
blogging about your dad worked out pretty well for KFC. let’s see how well it works for you.
A yet again we have some fat fuck with a frontal ass trying to use his clearly self induced obesity as an excuse to get special treatment. Just wheel his ass to the swamps and give the gators an early Thanksgiving
i wonder who tied that tie for him
probably gets a nasty rash from the ankle monitor
Judge is a saint for sparing the prison guards a 3-year sentence of fat-roll fungus and ass wiping
My boss is a fat fuck, just thought you guys should know
Amazing that a 550 lb man actually made it to live to 70. There cannot be much juice left in that pump of his.
you the man trent – keep it up.
every single barstool blogger is basically on house arrest.
”Sorry, I’m on house arrest” is now my go-to excuse to not socialize with everyone.
How is this guy fucking alive. Take his heart and give it to a deserving individual
maybe this will make BC rethink his hot dog intake
You’d think he’d know of a pill to help make him less fat
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