LA Times – Most players in the NBA receive their salary throughout the year — but then Kobe Bryant is not a typical NBA player. Negotiated as part of his specific contract, Bryant receives a balloon payment on Nov. 1. On Friday, the All-Star guard will receive $24,363,044 from the Lakers. Bryant’s salary for the entire season is $30,453,805 — the remaining $6.1 million will be paid out over the course of the year. While there’s a limit to how much a player can receive in advance, Bryant is right at that 80% maximum. Meanwhile, there’s still no firm timeline on recovery from his Achilles tendon tear. Bryant was injured in an April 12 win over the Golden State Warriors, undergoing surgery less than 12 hours after the incident.
So, how is your Friday going? Maybe you didn’t miss the Metro to work? Successful day! The bagel place had one more everything bagel when you got there? Best Friday ever! Not in Kobe Bryant’s world. Such a boss move getting the huge lump payment. Knowing Kobe, he did it just so he could say he did it, kinda like white women and terrible tattoos. Can you imagine waking up to a direct deposit of 24 mil in your Bank of America? Sure, they will probably rape Kobe out of a bunch of that money, but you know he’s into that anyway. Probably the only person in the universe who gets some random, bullshit charge and thinks “hey, that seems reasonable!”. Some sort of bro-code with other rapists, I suppose.
Kobe could have lit all his money on fire yesterday, and still woken up with 24 million dollars today, despite not having worked this year. That’s the American dream. How many of us could get that type of money for sitting on our asses and still want to get back to work? That’s heart. That’s work ethic. That’s a lot of t-shirts.