The Cubs Bomb Yabos When Anthony Rizzo Leads Off
The Cubs hit into 4 double plays on Monday night and I think I almost had a heart attack at 30. Then last night the ZANY Joe Maddon hit Anthony Rizzo lead-off and the entire script flipped with 5 glorious, beautiful yabos:
I can fuck with that. I can definitely fuck with 14-3 road wins.
Here’s what I can’t fuck with:
One game into Anthony Rizzo as the new leadoff hitter, and ESPN is already publishing articles like this:
On a slightly more serious note, one Zack Wheeler beatdown means nothing. He looked like absolute dogshit. So I choose to remain extremely skeptical of the idea of putting the 3 hitter in the lead off spot. Why? Well for starters he hasn’t done it since ever, and I think there’s an experience curve that might come into play. (Maybe.) Next, he no longer hits 3rd and that’s hard enough to replace as is. And then finally, how about some fucking consistency. Rizzo’s the leadoff hitter for how long? Until he hits 3 bombs in a game and Joe benches him for a couple days to marinate in the success? Or is this like an actual thing. I have no idea. All I know is that this blog started off as the Cubs hitting 5 yabos and that being cool and now I’m getting pissed so I’m going to do what any good behavioral therapist would suggest at this point and remove myself from the situation.