Louis CK said that when you’re a parent you’re not raising a kid, you’re raising the adult they will one day become. Well if that’s the case I think it’s pretty safe to say these kids are going to grow up to be the most spoiled, insufferable pieces of shit on the planet. Because it’s a well-known fact that any 3 year old who gets a roller coaster for his birthday is just going to get more greedy and more ungrateful as the years go on. I mean once you fire off the roller coaster, where do you go from there? Water slide at 5, petting zoo at 8, actual human beings dressed up as clowns entertaining them at 10.By the time this kid becomes a teenager you’re going to have a full blown theme park in your backyard. Fuck that. Best bet is to buy them Roller Coaster tycoon like my parents did and let them spend the next 5-10 years of their life getting computer animated children trapped in a hedge maze or send them flying off to their death on the Shuttle Coaster.
I respect this Dad for trying to give his kids a happy life. But the truth remains that he blew his load way too early. And now he’s going to spend the next 15 years of his life cleaning it up.
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