» Roller Coaster In California Gets Stuck At Its Peak For 2 Hours Barstool Sports

Roller Coaster In California Gets Stuck At Its Peak For 2 Hours

Chicago Sun Times – A newly built roller coaster stalled 150 feet above ground Sunday afternoon, stranding a dozen riders for almost two hours at a Northern California amusement park, a park spokeswoman said. The Superman Ultimate Flight roller coaster stopped at about 2:30 p.m. Sunday at the top of the ride, Six Flags Discovery Kingdom spokeswoman Nancy Chan told the Vallejo Times-Herald. Vallejo firefighters arrived at about 3 p.m. A theme park crane equipped with a large personnel bucket was prepared to reach the riders.

True story I’ve never been on a roller coaster in my life. I was always a water park and swimming guy growing up and years of playing Roller Coaster tycoon convinced me that it was wholly rational to think that one bad day could lead a ride operator to just launch one of those cars 1,000 MPH into the air before crashing into the side of a fucking mountain. But in recent years I finally convinced myself that I’d go ahead and take the plunge at the next available opportunity. Welp, fuck that shit. No chance I’m ever going near one of those things after seeing this episode play out. Being stuck at the crux of a death-defying roller coaster is literally the exact opposite of what I call a good time. If I had been on that thing I would’ve tried to climb out and jimmy my way down, undoubtedly falling and breaking my head on every beam and bar on the way down to my cement chalk outline 150 feet below. Fuck roller coasters, I’ll be sticking with my floaty noodle, please.

By neil posted July 30th, 2012 at 5:00 PM

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by johnnybegood on July 30, 2012 at 5:15 pm
Why am I not surprised that you're scared of roller coasters Neil.
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by barstoolsportschicago on July 30, 2012 at 5:21 pm
How can someone play roller coaster tycoon for years as a kid but never want to ride a real roller coaster? Thats like watching porn all day and not being attracted to women in reality....Or getting a job as a comedic blogger and never wanting to be funny....
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by darrenbragg99 on July 30, 2012 at 6:02 pm
Will you make a little fuckin effort and dig for good stories rather than just commenting on everything the suntimes has to say?
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by bdemps15 on July 30, 2012 at 6:06 pm
I'm actually with you on this one. Fuck being 6000 feet in the air going 230 mph. On slip and you are literally in a human rocket headed for death.
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by hello on July 30, 2012 at 6:15 pm
How was this worth even writing about??
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by southerngent on July 30, 2012 at 6:38 pm
Riding on a roller coaster is a right of passage to become a man. Makes perfect sense that you have never been on one. Neil, leave the computer and go play in traffic.
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by bkscrubbmuffin on July 30, 2012 at 6:52 pm
I haven't been a Neil hater in the past but my god.... are you trying to be funny? I didn't even see an attempt at a joke. You read like an old Jewish man chronically complaining.
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by fratasticvoyage on July 30, 2012 at 7:19 pm
Nice "smoke" choice Neil.... PS everything you have done sucks and it is no shocker that your pansy ass hasn't been on a roller coaster. Grow a set.
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by haleyingonmyface on July 30, 2012 at 8:34 pm
neil i haven't said shit since you started, but you asked for it on this one. no self respecting man would admit they've never been on a rollcoaster without fully expecting to get bashed on. the stoolies are even taking it easy because of how much they pity you, pussy.
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by presmoobs on July 30, 2012 at 10:14 pm
You know Neil if your not going to give any effort neither will I.
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by presmoobs on July 30, 2012 at 11:09 pm
Ps if this gets me banned so be it but it has to be said, for the good of us all. Evil wins when good men say nothing.Nice tranny you posted as a smoke today Neil, your an embarrassment to all the stool stands for.
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by mberrett on July 30, 2012 at 11:37 pm
I have yet to say one bad thing about Neil but I can't hold back today. Neil, what the fuck are you thinking with today's "Smokeshow"? That broad is fucking hideous. She's a 5, tops. Holy shit, man. If she's a smoke in your eyes, I would hate to see the broads that you've fucked.
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by fuckneil on July 31, 2012 at 12:28 am
you would blog about california you fucking fruitball
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by bigred5 on July 31, 2012 at 1:32 am
i bet eugene was somewhere on that roller coaster
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by slutnuts4 on July 31, 2012 at 1:56 am
please explain how a ride operator at a decent park has the ability to launch a car off the tracks? ride a coaster before pretending you have any clue about them.and once you get the spanx off todays "smoke" there'll be rolls spilling out everywhere
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by valbroski on July 31, 2012 at 2:11 am
Who woke up this morning and said I'd love to read a blog entry about roller coasters?
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by nicktuation on July 31, 2012 at 5:20 pm
This actually was a brilliant move by pres. Hire someone who isn't funny, let the stoolies rip his unfunny ass apart, thereby making the comment section the funniest part of the article.
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