Cheese? Just cheese? Fucking gross dude. Look I’ve never disagreed with D-Rose. Probably never will again. You know when new parents talk about the love they have for their children? You know before they walk/talk/start asking for money etc. That’s how I feel about D-Rose. Unconditional love. But Cheese? Just Cheese? If my trust was at 100% its now at 99.9% because just cheese pizza is a fucking psycho move.
Probably should’ve made a ranking of Chicago Pizza as our first post in Barstool-Chicago history but whatever. We’re here now. Lets do it.
Big Cat’s Chicago Pizza Rankings
1. Pequods – Whenever anyone asks me where to go in the City for Pizza I always say Pequods. Best Pizza, not touristy, no brainer.
2. Lou Malnati’s – Lou Mal’s is like that really dependable starter in baseball. Never gets shelled and will occasionally throw a 3 hit complete game shutout. You can always trust Lou’s.
3. Pizzeria Uno – Obviously anyone who doesn’t know Chicago is going to say Big Cat, you fucking moron, that’s a chain. Well I’m talking about the original Uno, the one that started it all. Fantastic pizza. Only downside is that it’s a tourist trap so if you try to go on a Friday/Saturday/Sunday you’ll probably wait 3 hours.
-Gino’s and Giordano’s – Just missed the cut for me. Personal preference. Some people like blondes some people like brunettes.
-Pizano’s on State – best thin crust downtown. Also, extra credit for Rudy Malnati stealing Lou Mal’s recipes and starting his own place. American Dream baby.
-Piece on North Ave. – as long as you can avoid the hipsters.
-Piehole in Boystown – Pizza is good and If usually when you call a flaming gay guy will say “Hello, welcome to my piehole”. Self aware flamboyancy is hilarious.
-Vito and Nick’s – Fucking hike to get to. Way way South on Pulaski. But absolutely worth the trip. The best thin crust in the entire state.
-Dimo’s (formerly Ian’s) on Clark in Wrigleyville – If you went to Wisconsin you understand.
-Big G’s on Clark in Wrigleyville – Similar to Ian’s. Specialty pizza by the slice. Ever had fried chicken and waffles on your pizza? Well now you have.
Let the debate begin.
If any stoolies work at any of these spots I’m more than happy to change my rankings for free pizza, no questions asked.