Barstool Sports

GOLDEN, Colo– The Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office on Thursday released a composite sketch of a man who tried to get a 61-year-old woman to touch him in his genitals.The woman was taking out her trash from her apartment on West 26th Avenue and Youngfield Street last Thursday morning when she stopped for a moment to catch her breath. A man she did not know approached her and asked if she was OK.

She told the man she has health issues and she was having a hard time catching her breath, police said. The man then offered to walk her back to her apartment.As they walked, the man held one of her arms, and he tried to force her hand to touch his genital area. When she pulled her hand back, he kept attempting to guide it back to his genitals, the sheriff’s office said.This happened several times before they were back at the woman’s back sliding glass door.In an attempt to dissuade him, she said, “I’m old and fat. You don’t want me.”He replied, “It doesn’t matter” and entered the apartment behind her.She yelled for her husband, who was downstairs, and the man fled.The suspect is described as having dark skin, about 5 feet 7 inches tall to 5 feet 10 inches tall, between 25 to 30 years old, with a lean build.He wore no shirt, and had navy blue fleece shorts.He was bald, had no facial hair, and his voice was described as deep and soothing.

So let me get this straight. This sweet looking half black half white shadow face man is walking around the streets topless, clearly looking to get his dick rubbed, and along comes this little old lady throwing out fuck me vibes getting all dirty and naughty tossing out the “trash” and getting “out of breath” and we’re saying that this guy did something wrong? Seriously? You even admitted it yourself lady, the guy has a “deep and soothing” voice. He’s lean. He’s topless. Don’t be afraid to admit someone turned down trash sex. We’ve all been there. Sure its embarrassing to get rejected like this but its no reason to call the cops. They’ll be other genitals to grab someday. Lot of hard dicks in that ocean, don’t be upset because you had to throw a boner back.

PS
The fact that this guy tried to hit on the lady that was literally out of breath from walking DOWN steps is taking desperation to a new level. Like I’ll fully admit that everyone needs a slump buster from time to time. The world isn’t all 9′s and 10′s looking to suck cock, but come on man. You couldn’t at least find someone who wasn’t dying from an asthma attack? Clean it up. Just find a chick that can breath in through her nose and out through her mouth and you should be fine.