VICTORIAN police are on the hunt for a man who ejaculated onto the back of a woman at a Melbourne music festival. A 20-year-old woman told police she was standing near the main stage of the St Kilda Festival on Sunday, February 8, watching hip hop group Thundamentals perform when a man standing behind her ejaculated onto her back. He then disappeared into the crowd.
“Everybody was touching each other but I noticed this guy was a bit too close to me and I tried to manoeuvre away,” the victim told reporters at a press conference this morning. “It made me feel uncomfortable, I’m pretty angry towards men. “I feel violated but I’m lucky it wasn’t worse.”
The woman was in the thick of the mosh pit when the incident occurred, Senior Detective Carin Wood said. “She was watching the band and felt a warm sensation on her back and turned around to see him doing up his fly,” she said. “There were thousands of people around. It’s obviously concerning behaviour for the police. Surely someone has seen something or know who this person is. “To have the courage to do that and to want to do that is obviously disturbing.” She said the man was at the festival by himself and the assault was believed to have been an isolated incident. She said the victim was “mortified” and that her clothing was being forensically analysed.
I know we throw the word Savage around pretty casually here but this right here is an absolutely savage move. To unzip your fly, let your dick out and just start jizzing on people? Unbelievable. That’s an outrageous level of horny. Literally can not wait for a porta potty or to be in the comfort of his own home. Nope, like a good hitter in baseball, see ball hit ball. See girl, jizz on girl. Savage as savage gets.
Oh and Police Sketch nailed it, as long as we’re looking for one of the street urchins from the Prince of Persia video games.
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