In Case You Didn’t Watch The ESPY’s Last Night, Here’s What You Missed

Worst night in the Sports year last night. Not a single game played, so naturally ESPN hijacked our lives with the ESPY’s. If you somehow managed to avoid them, here’s what you missed.

Lebron dressing like a movie theater usher and wearing sunglasses inside.

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Dwayne Wade, sorry THREE, wearing his chain on the outside of his dress shirt

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B-Marsh also dressing like an usher but gets a pass because he got to present with Katherine Webb. That was my totally unbiased analysis of that.

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Reggie Bush is still doing that weird thing where he’s dating a Kim Kardashian look alike

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Somehow Vince Young got in the door? Breach of security at the ESPY’s

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Marissa Miller gave me a boner

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The 2013 ESPY Awards at Nokia Theatre L.A. Live

So did Katherine Webb

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Belding crushing young V like it’s 1995

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Colin Kaepernick wore sunglasses inside too, but he gets a pass because he has one of the weirdest shaped faces of all time.

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Shit got sad for a little bit with some actually cool stories

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The 2013 ESPY Awards - Show

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Jason Sudeikis. Light at the end of the tunnel for mustachiod gentlemen

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Alex Morgan with her mom, solid genes

 

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Danica, who cares if she can’t drive for shit.

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Chris Berman lectured everyone because he’s the SWAMI!!!

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Lolo Jones, starting to look a little tranny-ish

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And last but not least, the Heat won every award. Crazy right? I was shocked too. An award show created by ESPN had the Miami Heat take home every ESPY, never saw that coming

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