If You Were Ever Wondering What It’s Like To Have Your Boss Tweet Out Your Phone Number To 130,000 People, Well Now You Know




I’ve already changed my old 312 number to a new one. Had that number for a decade, now that the bandaid is off I may get a new number every week. Stay off the grid.


I was deleting as I went and could never get under that 100 mark.



So in case you missed it yesterday Pres’s address and phone number got into the comment section. No sweat off my back right? Wrong. Because last night Pres posted a vine scrolling through all the numbers that had prank called him throughout the day. All the numbers plus oh would you look at that, Big Cat, who called him to partially prank him but also to talk about real world shit because you know, he’s my boss and it’s not abnormal to call your boss. Well once that happened I was done. Onslaught of texts and voicemails. By the end of the night I had gotten well over a 1,000 combined. Phone would not stop ringing.



Also, special shoutout to commenter “Sosa”. The tweet was a mistake by pres, mistakes happen, what can you do, Sosa though purposefully went and put my number in the comment section so that I got bombarded. So (you guys emailed and harassed him enough in 20 minutes that im taking his email down, sucks that I have a heart of gold) sorry Sosa, thanks again dude.



Now everyone not named Sosa, I don’t blame you for texting me, it was all in good fun and I’d like to think I took it in stride considering I texted a bunch of you back. So I won’t reveal anyone else’s phone number, even the dozen people that called me after 2 am.


Anyway, here were the best ones (hint, tits were involved)….



Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.20.41 PM


I hope to god Swag Daddy was touched on my behalf, but again, not in a creepy way.

Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.20.32 PM



Hey Big Cat’s number, lets ask him the penis size of another blogger!

Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.20.27 PM





This one hurt.

Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.20.20 PM

Nice Poppy Seed Bagel bro


Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.20.07 PM


Some guy who thought I’d be impressed with his abs.




Interesting. *Starts to slowly take pants down*







Ab boy’s brother chimed in. What the fuck is with that family and pulling their shirt up?


Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.41.59 PM


No chance I follow


Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.41.49 PM


Legit question, and my response is honest. Liquor is liquor, who gives a fuck.

Screen Shot 2013-11-21 at 11.45.14 PM


This guy basically wanted me to rate his life. I gave it an A-





Some dude wanted to see my feet, must be Asian.







I got in a couple sweet group chats. Pretty solid grub sesh.





Dude sent me his girlfriend’s ass, said I could fuck her for a bag of signed skittles. I said deal.





This kid wanted to buy me some mittens, kind of weird but also kind of considerate. Chicago is cold in the winter.




Miley Cyrus’s phone number. Here’s a shocker, it wasn’t Miley Cyrus.







Some people just wanted to complain about shit.




Hey you know what’s weirder than telling another man you’re in bed? Telling another man you want to do a quick facetime with the bros.




I saved a child’s life. Kind of a hero for this one.



I don’t have Kane’s phone number so hopefully he reads this blog. Kaner, Lauren says Hi.





Solid tip.





Not the Tits I was looking for.



These are the tits I was looking for.


Obviously NSFW but you’re a moron if you don’t click. LINK HERE, click next to scroll through



I like this guy, I don’t know why but I do




Finally some bro fired off about 40 pictures of Rob Schneider, thought that was pretty cool.




All in all a pretty good night with the Stoolies, thanks to everyone who texted or called, hopefully we never do that again.



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