The Grammy’s Have Basically Told Everyone They Need To Wear Burkas On Sunday

NewdayCBS is asking stars not to bare too much skin at the Grammy Awards on Sunday. The network requests that “buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered” for the televised award show. The memo sent out Wednesday also warned against “see-through clothing,” exposure of “the genital region” and said that “thong type costumes are problematic.” Representatives for CBS and the Recording Academy declined to comment on Thursday. Deadline Hollywood first reported the memo.

What else do you expect from a group of people who refer to themselves as “The Academy”? Gang of snobby, uptight white people. People who think that if little Jimmy catches a glimpse of Rihanna’s sideboob he’ll be furiously masturbating from that moment until it comes time for him to cross the River Styx and burn in hell. It’s asinine. Hey, Academy, you know who you give these awards to nowadays? You give them to blowup fuck dolls with an autotuner.

Now don’t get me wrong, I know every awful chick song and dance my ass off whenever they come on. But let’s not pretend that Etta James and Aretha Franklin are up for awards this year. Everyone’s nomination rode in on the back of sex appeal, not musical talent. You should be encouraging nudity. The invitation should read “Dress Code: Garden of Eden chic.” I want the chicks in fig leaves so small they make Eve look like an overdressed, prude slut. That’s why we’re all tuning in. Don’t pretend otherwise.

PS – didn’t see anything about outfits that just say “Nigger.” That still cool?

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