» That Redbull Space Jump Dude Is the Biggest Fraud On the Planet Barstool Sports: Boston

That Redbull Space Jump Dude Is the Biggest Fraud On the Planet

So like a dickhead I watched that moron Henry Rowengartner jump from outer space yesterday. I just had to see what all the hype was about. So I spent 2 hours with a thumb up my ass watching a balloon slowly rise into the sky until this clown jumped. Well I’m not sure what I was expecting but this had to be the biggest farce in the history of civilization. Everybody freaking out because he broke a couple records. Big fucking whoop. I honestly could have done what he did. There was no talent involved whatsoever. The balloon did all the work. All he had to do was fall out of his spaceship. Any idiot could do that. The only variable that he was in his control was of when he pulled the parachute. And guess what? He pussied out like a little a punk ass bitch and pulled that shit 20 seconds before setting the longest freefall record. So why is everybody acting like this jump was a success? I thought this bro was supposed to live to get radical? The one thing he could control he failed at. He got scared and bailed. Total coward. Total failure. Total bum.

By elpresidente posted October 15th, 2012 at 9:30 AM

Top 2 Comments

40 comments Sort by Popularity Sort by Date

Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by Hipneck on October 15, 2012 at 9:34 am
Wow, first! Anyway, I thought it was pretty cool....but only watched the vid after the fact. I'd never have wasted precious hours sitting there like a wart.
- Up: 2
- Down: 19
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by man_bear_pig on October 15, 2012 at 9:41 am
The real man is the one who did this in 1961 without all the computers and safety shit on board.
- Up: 12
- Down: 1
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by ficken-die-hocker on October 15, 2012 at 9:42 am
You talk a pretty big game for someone who hasn't done shit in their life. Oh you could do this? You know what Portnoy, do it. No seriously, I want to see you go up 127,000 feet in the air and fall at 600 mph. You claim to be able to do all these incredible things, but seriously you have done nothing in your life."Oh Spartan race, I can fucking do that." "Oh whoops pulled my hammy running 40 yards, I'm done.""Oh walking up stairs, I can do that." "Oh whoops I pulled my man titty."The only thing you've contributed to this world is post pictures of hot girls, and you're in your late 30s which makes it fucking weird.I think we all know who the biggest fraud on the planet is Dave, its you.
- Up: 154
- Down: 17
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by dana bibles midget penis on October 15, 2012 at 9:42 am
Between tommygunz86 and Hipneck the comment section is on fire today.
- Up: 2
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by TonyTwotoes on October 15, 2012 at 9:43 am
I was praying that they made some miscalculation or his suit didn't work and the pressure crushed his skull like a grape.
- Up: 0
- Down: 5
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by Georgia on October 15, 2012 at 9:44 am
He literally fell 127,000 feet. Thats it. Gravity did all the work. I'm with EP on this one.
- Up: 4
- Down: 4
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by joeytwotimes on October 15, 2012 at 9:49 am
Hey ficken, you are an angry little elf aren't you?
- Up: 1
- Down: 2
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by yaaaa on October 15, 2012 at 9:50 am
You're the biggest internet troll on the planet.
- Up: 2
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by bigdickbatista on October 15, 2012 at 9:51 am
Portnoy's beak would still touch the ground at 127,000 feet up
- Up: 50
- Down: 2
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by nawtymassarawty on October 15, 2012 at 9:55 am
Ficken, you mad bro?
- Up: 1
- Down: 5
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by edrooney on October 15, 2012 at 9:56 am
I watched and thought it was pretty damn cool. I will say that if his suit tore and his organs exploded, that would have been a helluva bonus.
- Up: 2
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by daveypicbrone on October 15, 2012 at 9:56 am
lmao ficken is the biggest hardo on planet earth. eat shit and die bro
- Up: 3
- Down: 6
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by ngraham182 on October 15, 2012 at 9:57 am
dude for one his name is Felix Baumgartner so learn what the fuck you are writing about before you write it. and second you would fucking die in a heartbeat if you were up there. thats because you are an idiot and clearly have no fucking idea the danger of falling at 700 mph from 120,000 feat. if you havent noticed the parachute alone could have killed him so smarten the fuck up before you write this shit dumbass, this isnt even funny as a joke
- Up: 2
- Down: 10
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by Whatwhat on October 15, 2012 at 9:57 am
I mean, I know Pres is joking (I think?), but do other people here think that's all he did? Just fell and let gravity do all the work? Do y'all understand the margin of error involved? This wasn't normal sky diving shit. There was no air for the first few miles, which meant he had no control over his body, which meant had he fucked up the jump, he could've gone into this "spin-o-rama of death" -- where his body is flipped in an accelerated rate, ultimately leading to his brain becoming the consistency of oatmeal. Buncha hardos up in here.
- Up: 12
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by wilburham on October 15, 2012 at 10:02 am
anyone that watches this or cares about it is a grade a faggot, what a waste of time.
- Up: 4
- Down: 8
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by keystoned on October 15, 2012 at 10:07 am
All in all, Felix did pussy out with that chute when he could've just fallen like another 20 seconds and beat another record. Dropped the ball on that one.
- Up: 2
- Down: 2
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by surfnturf on October 15, 2012 at 10:09 am
so you have the physical ability to free fall from outerspace but you can't even walk up a flight of stairs without getting a heart attack? hm..
- Up: 7
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by volund on October 15, 2012 at 10:15 am
Isn't his last name Gardenhoser?
- Up: 1
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by pedre123 on October 15, 2012 at 10:28 am
http://soundcloud.com/the-promusitist/in-the-air-tonight-dubstep
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by SlapHappy on October 15, 2012 at 10:28 am
It's pretty cool as far as stunts go, but pure genius as far as advertising goes.1. Sponsor extreme athletes 2. Sell tons of RedBull 3. Profit!
- Up: 1
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by djwang on October 15, 2012 at 10:37 am
Can't stand commenters who are too fucking stupid to realize when Pres is making a joke
- Up: 0
- Down: 3
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by Evil One on October 15, 2012 at 10:46 am
You gotta love the fact that the guy who set the recordit in 1960, probably did it wearing sweatpants and a hockey helmet.
- Up: 8
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by englewood joyride on October 15, 2012 at 10:46 am
His name is Henry ROVENgartner you dumbfuck.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by dcod on October 15, 2012 at 10:52 am
@SlapHappy is right, and the biggest winner here (beside redbull) will be Virgin Galactic. They'll now put these suits on their space tourists, claiming that the tourists are safe, and sit back and rake in the cashola.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by whiteboyawesome on October 15, 2012 at 11:32 am
Oh so you think you can do this? http://sourcefednews.com/2012/10/15/felix-baumgartners-space-jump-helmet-cam-footage/ Shut the fuck up prez. Your fake ego is starting to get bigger than your nose
- Up: 1
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by turnemloose on October 15, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Lets push Neil out of a spaceship
- Up: 4
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by briar on October 15, 2012 at 12:26 pm
Incorrect. That jump took a tremendous amount of training and preparation. Baumgartner had to be able to prevent drag and stop himself from spinning out of control and not pass out when he hit the sound barrier, to name a few. Just study it on up.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by benzmac16v on October 15, 2012 at 12:36 pm
I am with Prez all the way. This was a good ENGINEERING effort. But this douche acting like he is some kind of hero is sickening. It could have been a dog in that suit, it wouldn't have changed anything. I am baffled how this got more attention than SpaceX docking with the space station.
- Up: 0
- Down: 1
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 9
- Down: 3
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 2
- Down: 7
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 0
- Down: 8
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 0
- Down: 10
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 0
- Down: 9
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Glad to see the rookie found something to do after his arm went back to normal and he couldn't pitch for the cubs anymore
- Up: 0
- Down: 14
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by tommygunz86 on October 15, 2012 at 1:38 pm
Oops
- Up: 2
- Down: 2
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by DoyleBrunsonsSaggySack on October 15, 2012 at 1:51 pm
Sounds like someone needs to put up a big "comments" number to close a sales deal. Hatred gonna hate. Portnoy's gonna troll.
- Up: 1
- Down: 1
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by dj_jlp on October 15, 2012 at 4:39 pm
I dont care what Portnoy says, i agree he wouldnt do this if he was offered a million dollars, i give the guy props, it takes balls to know that if that suit fails your bodily fluids boil and your eyes explode out of your head...I bet it was one hell of a ride, im sure el pres will make some retarded video of him jumping off something to prove his "ballsiness"
- Up: 1
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by johnnybegood on October 15, 2012 at 5:42 pm
Pres, how many times have you jumped out of a plane wearing a parachute at any altitude? Video please.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by celtics34truth on October 15, 2012 at 8:40 pm
pres you are a moron and this website used to be alot better. fire neil. and this dude jumping from space is a fucking badass. you sit at home all day and jack off to 20 year old smokeshows while updating your shitty blogs.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0
Thumbs Up Thumbs Down
by verbal on October 15, 2012 at 11:16 pm
Good blog! I had the exact same thought about him pussying out from that freefall record. It was a downer for sure! Did not watch the 2 hour thing like a sucker though, went straight to highlights.
- Up: 0
- Down: 0