Time to reload the Miltons machine. Send all sob stories to email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org and help us help you. And you need to send pictures! If you sent an email without a picture resend with one to be considered.
My bro Daniel or “Dirty Dan” has most of his shit in line, except his style is questionable at best. Kid wears sweatpants every day of the week and somehow gets away with it. Chicks have called him out on wearing the same thing two days in a row and he just shrugs it off. For any formal occasion, he breaks out the classic looney toons tie and he tried to wear it to prom until his date shut him down. Please help him out before he goes off to the Ivy League next year and gets discriminated against.
Viva La Stool,