Barstool Sports

Germany – Shit hits the fans at Bundesliga match.

Bundesliga matches took bizarre and unappetising turns at the weekend, with a Hoffenheim employee blasting Borussia supporters with a high-pitched siren – and Cologne fans showering their Schalke rivals with faeces and urine. … Schalke 04 fans meanwhile might have chosen a howling siren given the choice – at their team’s match against 1 FC Köln over the weekend, some were showered with faeces and urine by the opposition. The police confirmed on Tuesday that at least one person in the Köln fan block had been seen ‘placing’ faeces into a plastic beer glass and then throwing it at his rivals. The solid organic missile was followed by at least two urine-filled plastic beer glasses.

Here’s another story to file away for the next time someone tries to paint the America sports fan as a drunken, violent, mouth-breathing troglodyte because sometimes guys get rowdy and act up.  Like remember a few years ago when the Yankees were in town and Gary Sheffield was chasing a ball along the right field wall and a fan in Row 1 gave him a Three Stooges-like nosey?  What the guy did was flat out wrong.  For all I remember it might have cost the Sox an extra base and maybe the game and there was no defending it.  But from the media storm that came out of it, you would’ve thought he stuck a shiv in Sheffield like he was Monica Seles.  The Globe ran a whole series of follow up pieces about how drunkeness has spiraled out of control at ballgames and the stands at Fenway have turned into “Lord of the Flies” and no decent human beings can go there anymore and whatever will become of the children blahbitty blah.  When the inconvenient truth of the matter is that sporting events in this town have never been better, soberer or less violent than they are right now.  And compared to European soccer matches… the Beautiful Game that we should all embrace because it’s so popular in the parts of the world that would love to blow us to smithereens… a game in Boston is like Christmas service at the Mormon Tabernacle.  I mean, Bruins fans are loud and God knows they get verbally abusive, but these Europeans throw poop.  Let me repeat that.  They.  Throw.  Poop.  So take your elitist Euro-envy and your multiculturalism and stick them in a plastic beer cup and throw them at each other.  I’m sticking with good old fashioned poop-free American hooliganism, thanks.  @JerryThornton1

PS.  “Dude, what the fuck is wrong with German people?”