(MSN) – Good news for dudes worldwide: There may actually be two Kate Uptons out there, as long as you don’t mind moving to Moscow. A Kate Upton retweet earned Upton’s Russian doppelganger thousands of Twitter followers and proposals (ranging from the indecent to the merely icky) from guys around the globe. In the pic Upton retweeted, the Russian fan named Ania is seen mimicking Upton’s famous Sports Illustrated cover pose: blond hair, big boobs and furry jacket.
I feel like I’m taking crazy pills this morning. First the mom who’s son narrowly escaped death on a middle school basketball court and now this?! Hey internet, this fucking Commie looks NOTHING like Kate Upton. They both have big tits and are in cold places but the similarities come to a screeching halt there. This chick looks as much like Kate Upton as I do Matthew McConaughey just because I have long blond hair: zero. Say what you will about Kate Upton’s size but her face is gorgeous. No way around that. So to say this Bond villain looks like her when I can tell through a pile of shadows that she’s hideous is a goddammn slap in the face. If you’re so ugly that an Instagram filter can’t make you look hot then you can’t compare yourself to a SI Swimsuit girl. Mail order bride is probably more your speed than international sensation model.