Orlandosentinal - A 62-year-old Conch Key woman who the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office says is known as “the sea hag” is accused of fatally shooting a man who refused to give her a beer. The incident happened Sunday night at a home on North Conch Avenue in the Middle Keys.According to the Sheriff’s Office, Carolyn Dukeshire shot Martin Mazur five times in the abdomen, back and arm when she asked for a beer and he refused.
Wikipedia Definitions of a Sea Hag
- Sea Hag – A hideous woman found on a cruise ship
- Sea Hag – A woman that looks as though she has been ravaged by years at sea.
I know what everybody is thinking. Hey Pres I thought you didn’t talk about stories where people died and shit. Yes that’s true. So why did I post this? For two reasons. First just as a lesson to all the kids out there. When a Sea Hag walks up to you and asks you for a beer you give it to the Sea Hag 100% of the time. Sea Hags don’t fuck around. They’ll just open fire on your ass like it ain’t no thing. #2. This is a public service announcement for anybody looking to move to the Keys and become a Sea Hag. It looks like there is a job opening. I just feel like it’s not everyday a Sea Hag position becomes available. Got to jump on it when it’s hot.