What's Up For The Weekend?

[lugnutz]

Officer comes up to my door and asked for the license and reg.....took me a second to find the reg.

"have you been drinking?"
"I had two because I'm driving tonight"
"ok Im going to need you to step out of the car and establish your sobriety"
"ok but before I open the door I should let you know I am armed with a handgun on my waist"
"dont reach for it and we dont have a problem"


So I get to the curb
"I need you to stand with your heels together and follow my ....my ...I forgot my pen in the car"
She turns around and starts to rifle through her cruiser looking for a pen...kepp in mind she never disarmed me, asked to see my permit, or even knew where in fact the weapon was....I could have shot her if I were a criminal
She returns (mean time i am standing at complete unwavering attention)" please follow my pen"

No problem, I've passed 6 of these and will never fail one

"get back in your vehicle and I'll return your license and reg"


I get back in and the 4 people including my boss are shaking in their shoes......I tell them to relax..I dont get DWI's.

Amazingly Dennis can always drive Lugnutz was fucking wasted!

[lugnutz]

I forgot! When she was in the car looking for the pen I stupidly let Lugnutz ask her "do you know who I am" ....lucky I shut him up quick!

[lugnutz]

So no DWI and my boss just gave me a 1% performance bonus for it.....win win!

[mcm]

lucky bastard

[BS1]

well I dont know about anyone else, but I was expecting tits, ass and orgy stories.....WTF

[lugnutz]

Very lucky!!

I got home a couple hours later...I left the water running in the sink and went to bed. My wife said she has never seen me that bad before...and there are thousands of before s.

[B Luc]

So no DWI and my boss just gave me a 1% performance bonus for it.....win win!

Only 1%? Was it in cash at least?

[lugnutz]

1% of the stores gross.....it would have paid for 3 days of my lawyer if I was nabbed hahaha

[B Luc]

LOL

[lugnutz]

well I dont know about anyone else, but I was expecting tits, ass and orgy stories.....WTF

Im not a machine man... sometimes I just want to get drunk and not be a porn star

[tballa55]

Sooooo what you're saying is you didn't fuck the female cop who pulled you over and you told this story why????

[lugnutz]

Tonight-taking a new girl out wish me luck
Friday- picking up my brides new ring...and grabbing my new 45 from my buddy Joey
Saturday-wife leaves for week at Hampton.....O boy! My liver hurts already
Sunday golf..golf....golf..pool...nap

[B Luc]

You getting a .45? 1911? Might need to take that for a quick spin next weekend.

And what happened to that new years resolution?

[lugnutz]

We should shoot before you head out....Ill break out the AR.


Yeah NYE resolutions were meant to be broken! haha

[B Luc]

Definitely...but when the fuck did you get an AR? Last time I was up you only had the Walther. Business must be really good.

CP has to be at the race at like 5 AM. He estimates about 9 hours total. So we can do it while he's racing, or after he's done.

And yes...they definitely are.