Bossy say: What do you mean he won’t let you? You don’t live in Afghanistan, love. This is Australia where ??” thankfully - we can tell arrogant, controlling boyfriends Where to stick their half-assed ultimatums.
I don’,Jimmy Choo Sandals;t think it’s crazy to want to go to your office Christmas party. Why shouldn’t you get to know your colleagues out of work hours? Some of the best business deals are done outside the workplace - in the pub, at restaurants, on golf courses. There’s nothing wrong with talking and interacting with people you work with on a social level - as your boyfriend well knows.
I think unless there’s a legitimate reason your boyfriend doesn’t want you to go (like um, let me think… you shagged a co-worker at a Christmas party) then you should go - frocked-up and defiant.
Of course this is a bigger issue than the annual office get together. You say you actually took a lie detector test to prove you hadn’t cheated. That’s major. I wonder if you realise how major it is? Perhaps you do because it sounds like with this last decree your boyfriend has pushed you just a little too far.
You’,Jimmy Choo Bridal;re beginning to realise you will never be able to reassure your boyfriend completely about your fidelity. His insecurity is a black hole. You’re probably already careful what you wear when you go out so as not to be accused of attracting the attention of other men and take care about how long to you talk to men when he’s around. What next - a chastity belt?
You are headed down a rocky road and you know it. There more you pander to his insecurities the more he will expect you to alter your behaviour until soon you won’t be allowed out at all. It’s time you stood up for yourself in this relationship and questioned whether a relationship where you are bullied and controlled is better than no relationship at all?
I don’t think he’ll leave if you go to the Christmas party. I think he’ll bluster and threaten like bullies do. Go ahead and enjoy the office party this year. Little does he know his behaviour has ensured it will be more than a mere office knees up - it’s a grand step towards reinstating your independence.
Dear Bossy: I am a 27 year old girl (ok, woman) who has been in a relationship for almost the last nine years. My issue is with my partner who refuses to let me go to the work christmas party - referring to it as a shagfest. He doesnt feel ‘comfortable’ with me attending the event as he beleives drunken behaviour could lead to certain misdemeanors which would ultimately result in me cheating on him. Let me state right now that throughout our relationship I have been nothing but loyal to this man. We have gone through ups and downs and in the early stages of our relationship. I even succumbed to lie detector tests to prove my fidelity to him. I do love this man and wouldnt be with him otherwise - am I crazy to want to attend a work christmas party (I dont attend any other drunken activities throughout the year), when it may give me an opportunity to get to know colleagues on another level and let my hair down, when he is adamant that I should not attend (in fact, he has now issued an ultimatum - go to the christmas party and I am out of here). He on the other hand, attends work functions when required and has a drink along with the best of us… Your thoughts?? Mel.
