Barstool Sports

TULANE - Tulane University Police Department is investigating the theft of more than 2,000 copies of The Tulane Hullabaloo’s Feb. 28 issue from newsstands across the university’s campus on Thursday.  Hullabaloo Distribution Manager James Arney said he first noticed the theft after he had nearly finished delivering the newspapers.  “I came back from Diboll Parking Garage for my second-to-last paper delivery,” Arney said. “I was going to take [the newspapers from the Lavin-Bernick Center] to Reily, and then, I noticed they weren’t there. So I looked in the recycling bin and there were, like, 10 stacks [of papers] in there.” Arney said he tried to recover some still-usable papers from the bin and then alerted The Hullabaloo’s managing editorial board.  Hullabaloo staff writer Sam Fishman said he saw two men stealing and disposing of newspapers near Phelps House.  “I saw them walking with two stacks of paper in each hand, so I followed them,” Fishman said. “I saw them open the recycling bins behind Phelps, and one guy threw it in.”

Previously on the U – Tulane Kappa Sigma Frat Goes Hard, and By “Goes Hard” I Mean Police Found A Billion Pounds Of Hard Drugs There

Worst fucking pledges ever.  Hey morons the point is to do this quietly and secretly.  Not let every newspaper distributer and campus cop in a mile radius watch you take 2,000 papers and dump them in the first public trash can you come across.   Somebody’s getting a paddle shoved so far up their ass we’ll never see it again.  Anyway I guess what shocks me is that the frat wanted to cover this up in the first place?  Cover what up, getting in a little bit of trouble for drug possession?  Having a few bags of weed and E and molly and coke and shit lying around your house?    So un-Tulane like.  I mean this is Tulane’s bread and butter.  Hard drugs and partying.   3 trips to Mardi Gras taught me that the hard way.   Just seems weird they’d want to cover it up instead of taking a full page ad out themselves promoting how hard Kappa Sig goes.

I guess that settles it.  We officially need to bring the Blackout down to New Orleans.  We get it.  You guys like to party.  We like to party.  Match made in Heaven.  Also seems like some people might need a little cheering up after a rough month so it’s kind of our duty to head down and fuck shit up a little bit…

Blackout New Orleans – Sugar Mill – April 12th – Tickets on sale Friday at Noon