Toronto Sun- A man was killed by tigers at a zoo on Wednesday after he scaled a fence and crossed a moat to get into their enclosure in the Danish capital Copenhagen, police said. The man, in his early 20s, was savaged by three tigers after he broke into Copenhagen Zoo in the early hours. He was dead when staff arrived for work. “We received an emergency call at about 7:30 a.m. that a person had been found lying in the tiger pen and that three tigers were surrounding that person,” police Superintendent Lars Borg told Reuters. “The tigers attacked him and killed him. It is likely that a bite to the throat was the primary reason for his death,” Borg said. Police said the man, who had not yet been identified, may have entered the enclosure as a way of committing suicide. They said he was not Danish but his nationality was not yet known. He had a Denmark resident’s permit. Psychologists have been called to the zoo to talk to staff who found the body, the zoo’s chief executive Steffen Straede said.
Obviously it’s too bad that this guy killed himself but hey at least he went fucking balls out about it. Anyone can cut their wrists in a bathtub or turn their car on and shut the garage door; it takes a special kind of dedication to get willingly Siegfried and Royed. This guy broke into a fucking zoo in the middle of the night with the sole purpose of being eaten alive by tigers. Even the guy in Ohio that recreated Jumanji last year shot himself before the animals he released ate his head like a cantaloupe for breakfast. It’s a shame to see his talents went to waste on ending his life, because this has to be the the most innovative suicide I have ever seen in my entire life. I’ve always said that if you’re going to off yourself you might as well go out in a way that people will remember you for. If the cause of death section on your death certificate reads “Suicide by tigers,” people are going to fucking remember you.
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