Barstool Sports

TSG – A passenger who was flying from London to New York is facing a federal criminal charge after he allegedly placed his hand up the skirt of a flight attendant and “grabbed her genital area” and “began to run his fingers back and forth,” according to an FBI agent.  The incident, which occurred Thursday on a British Airways flight bound for John F. Kennedy International Airport, resulted in the arrest of Iurii Chumak, 53.  In a misdemeanor criminal complaint excerpted here, FBI Agent Thais Canin reported that the flight attendant has just provided coffee to Chumak when she turned away from him to serve other passengers across the aisle in row 42. As she “bent over slighty” to pour coffee, Chumak allegedly groped her.  A second flight attendant, Canin added, saw Chumak “grab the first flight attendant’s genital area” and immediately approached the passenger and placed him in restraints. The second attendant told the FBI that a male passenger had previously complained that Chumak–drinking from a bottle of Dewar’s–had “bothered and verbally abused” his wife.  When questioned by federal agents after the plane arrived in New York, Chumak said he “was drinking on the airplane, fell asleep, and woke up in restraints.”

Listen you tell me a dude tried to forcibly fingerblast a chick 99.9% of the time I will hop out of my computer chair and beat the shit out of them.  Or at the very least I will use my cell phone to alert the proper authorities and avoid a confrontation entirely.  However when it comes down to flight attendants in the middle of a cross country flight frankly I just don’t give a shit.  Sorry flight attendants but you had this coming.  Not sure I’ve ever encountered a bigger group of rude cocky power-tripping cunts in my life than flights attendants.  Seriously whatever happened to the good old days when they were Stewardesses and every one was hot as fuck in a tiny little skirt flirting with you flashing their tits and shit to make you feel comfortable?  Pretty sure they invited you to fingerbang them when they bent over to pour coffee not scream bloody murder and tie your ass up in restraints.  Nowadays they’re all bitter 55 year old menopausal bitches who are just itching to fist fight you if your electronic device isn’t shut off within 3 seconds of the announcement.   So not to sound insensitive but you’ll excuse me if I just crank up my iPod and keep on reading Sky Mall while you get finger fucked by the creepy dude blasted on Dewars.